1 00:00:06,720 --> 00:00:09,470 Hey! 2 00:00:09,470 --> 00:00:11,720 Hey. 3 00:00:11,720 --> 00:00:13,595 For those of you who watched last week 4 00:00:13,595 --> 00:00:15,262 and don't have drug-induced brain damage, 5 00:00:15,262 --> 00:00:16,553 you can skip the next 30 seconds. 6 00:00:16,553 --> 00:00:18,220 You don't have to watch that shit. 7 00:00:18,220 --> 00:00:20,053 - The rest of you losers... 8 00:00:20,053 --> 00:00:21,511 here you go. 9 00:00:21,511 --> 00:00:23,345 Sparky, Shelly. Shelly, Sparky. 10 00:00:23,345 --> 00:00:24,345 She's your boss. 11 00:00:24,345 --> 00:00:26,720 Well, vice boss. 12 00:00:26,720 --> 00:00:28,595 I made a little arrangement with Larry. 13 00:00:28,595 --> 00:00:30,553 - So you're mine now. - You were right. 14 00:00:30,553 --> 00:00:31,761 We got to kill her. 15 00:00:31,761 --> 00:00:33,095 If you want Todd, 16 00:00:33,095 --> 00:00:34,012 you're gonna have to go through me. 17 00:00:34,012 --> 00:00:35,970 His manager. That's who. 18 00:00:35,970 --> 00:00:37,720 Do you want to go upstairs? 19 00:00:37,720 --> 00:00:39,470 We could kick off these heels, 20 00:00:39,470 --> 00:00:41,304 raid the minibar, and check out the view. 21 00:00:41,304 --> 00:00:44,220 I left you a little something on the nightstand. 22 00:00:46,470 --> 00:00:48,053 Saw an old lady get shot 23 00:00:48,053 --> 00:00:50,553 at the Ashcroft bus stop last night. 24 00:00:50,553 --> 00:00:51,636 You know, the streetlights were out. 25 00:00:51,636 --> 00:00:54,220 You did a good thing, Citizen Carl. 26 00:00:54,220 --> 00:00:55,262 Got involved. 27 00:00:55,262 --> 00:00:57,470 Made a change. 28 00:00:57,470 --> 00:00:59,429 Do you want to join me? 29 00:00:59,429 --> 00:01:01,179 - Faye Donahue. - Frank Gallagher. 30 00:01:01,179 --> 00:01:03,429 Let's go to my place and eat this Greek food. 31 00:01:03,429 --> 00:01:04,595 You live in your car? 32 00:01:04,595 --> 00:01:06,095 Indeed I do. 33 00:02:48,553 --> 00:02:50,304 You? 34 00:02:50,304 --> 00:02:52,012 What the fuck are you doing here? 35 00:02:52,012 --> 00:02:54,137 Hey, hey, what the fuck, man? Hey! 36 00:03:10,137 --> 00:03:12,887 Good morning. 37 00:03:12,887 --> 00:03:14,095 Where--where's Fred? 38 00:03:14,095 --> 00:03:16,095 He passed out while nursing. 39 00:03:16,095 --> 00:03:18,095 We've got six to eight minutes tops. 40 00:03:18,095 --> 00:03:19,720 Mm. 41 00:03:21,845 --> 00:03:23,220 Oh, and one of us has to go to the store today 42 00:03:23,220 --> 00:03:24,761 and get more diaper cream 43 00:03:24,761 --> 00:03:25,803 'cause his rash is now halfway up his back. 44 00:03:25,803 --> 00:03:27,053 Oh, yeah. Talk dirty to me. 45 00:03:31,678 --> 00:03:33,970 Wait. 46 00:03:33,970 --> 00:03:35,345 Wait. You said it's worse than yesterday. 47 00:03:35,345 --> 00:03:37,511 What? 48 00:03:37,511 --> 00:03:39,304 Fred's rash. 49 00:03:39,304 --> 00:03:42,304 Uh, no, it's fine. 50 00:03:42,304 --> 00:03:45,429 Hey. No. His ass is fine. 51 00:03:45,429 --> 00:03:47,928 And your ass is fine. 52 00:03:55,387 --> 00:03:56,761 Yeah. It's just--sorry. 53 00:03:56,761 --> 00:03:58,720 It's just, the new daycare says 54 00:03:58,720 --> 00:04:01,220 they can't take him if he's sick. 55 00:04:01,220 --> 00:04:03,012 It's diaper rash. 56 00:04:03,012 --> 00:04:06,095 It's not the bubonic plague. All babies have diaper rash. 57 00:04:06,095 --> 00:04:08,012 Okay. 58 00:04:08,012 --> 00:04:09,304 Mm. 59 00:04:12,053 --> 00:04:13,928 Mm, maybe we should get it checked out, though. 60 00:04:13,928 --> 00:04:15,928 - Lip. - You know? Yeah. 61 00:04:15,928 --> 00:04:18,595 Lip, he's gonna be at daycare for four hours total. 62 00:04:18,595 --> 00:04:20,887 - Get a grip. 63 00:04:20,887 --> 00:04:22,720 Look, we don't have a choice. You want to-- 64 00:04:22,720 --> 00:04:24,720 Look at my chart. 65 00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:27,803 Yeah, but it's his first day. 66 00:04:27,803 --> 00:04:30,179 You've got AA. Then you're at work till four. 67 00:04:30,179 --> 00:04:31,845 I'm at the salon at noon. 68 00:04:31,845 --> 00:04:34,845 So there's a four-hour gap in child care. 69 00:04:34,845 --> 00:04:37,387 Yeah. So Brad'll let me out of work early. 70 00:04:37,387 --> 00:04:39,179 We need the cash. 71 00:04:39,179 --> 00:04:41,220 Well... 72 00:04:41,220 --> 00:04:44,345 I mean, we need the cash so we can afford daycare. 73 00:04:44,345 --> 00:04:46,845 Doesn't that seem a little ass-backwards? 74 00:04:46,845 --> 00:04:48,304 No. 75 00:04:48,304 --> 00:04:50,137 Ass-backwards is the Gallagher method, 76 00:04:50,137 --> 00:04:52,845 where the next-oldest kid just keeps kind of a vague eye 77 00:04:52,845 --> 00:04:53,970 on the rest of the herd. 78 00:04:53,970 --> 00:04:55,803 Well, it's free. 79 00:04:55,803 --> 00:04:57,262 Liam is ten. 80 00:04:57,262 --> 00:04:58,636 He's not watching our baby. 81 00:04:58,636 --> 00:05:00,137 Liam? 82 00:05:00,137 --> 00:05:01,636 I was gonna say Franny. 83 00:05:01,636 --> 00:05:05,304 - Oh, Franny? - Mm-hmm. 84 00:05:06,678 --> 00:05:08,887 - No. - Fuck. 85 00:05:13,012 --> 00:05:14,511 ...get some fuckin' flapjacks. 86 00:05:14,511 --> 00:05:16,845 Ian Gallagher? Mikhailo Milkovich? 87 00:05:24,304 --> 00:05:26,678 Yeah, I'm Ian Gallagher. Can I help you, Officer? 88 00:05:26,678 --> 00:05:27,970 Got some bad news for you. 89 00:05:27,970 --> 00:05:29,595 Your PO was found dead this morning. 90 00:05:29,595 --> 00:05:30,803 Paula's dead? 91 00:05:30,803 --> 00:05:32,511 Fell out of a third-floor window. 92 00:05:32,511 --> 00:05:34,553 Detectives want you both to come down to the station today, 93 00:05:34,553 --> 00:05:36,012 make statements. 94 00:05:36,012 --> 00:05:37,304 Why? 95 00:05:37,304 --> 00:05:39,179 We don't know anything about that. 96 00:05:39,179 --> 00:05:41,720 Whenever a PO dies, detectives interview all the parolees, 97 00:05:41,720 --> 00:05:43,220 especially if the death was suspicious. 98 00:05:43,220 --> 00:05:44,595 Suspicious? 99 00:05:44,595 --> 00:05:46,595 Well, people usually open a window 100 00:05:46,595 --> 00:05:48,470 before they jump out it. 101 00:05:48,470 --> 00:05:50,345 See you at the station. 102 00:05:50,345 --> 00:05:52,304 Bring Milkovich. 103 00:05:55,179 --> 00:05:56,220 Good. 104 00:05:56,220 --> 00:05:58,053 Go. Get your backpacks. 105 00:05:58,053 --> 00:06:00,220 - Get your book, Amy. 106 00:06:00,220 --> 00:06:02,887 Let's go! Let's go, people! 107 00:06:02,887 --> 00:06:05,262 Kev, get dressed! We leave in three. 108 00:06:05,262 --> 00:06:07,429 V, look at this. 109 00:06:07,429 --> 00:06:08,803 - What is it? - IRS. 110 00:06:08,803 --> 00:06:10,429 Oh, no! 111 00:06:10,429 --> 00:06:12,387 Sweet baby Jesus. No, no, no, no. 112 00:06:12,387 --> 00:06:13,761 Our day just got shitty. 113 00:06:13,761 --> 00:06:15,387 Did we not pay our taxes on time? 114 00:06:15,387 --> 00:06:16,803 Are you asking me? 115 00:06:16,803 --> 00:06:18,304 How do I know? You do the taxes. 116 00:06:18,304 --> 00:06:19,595 No, I know--I know-- I know we did. 117 00:06:19,595 --> 00:06:20,928 I-I paid the check, 118 00:06:20,928 --> 00:06:23,429 and I did the amend B-59X whatever. 119 00:06:23,429 --> 00:06:25,053 I know I paid it. 120 00:06:25,053 --> 00:06:27,387 What do you want me to do? Flush it? Burn it? 121 00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:29,553 No. We got to face it head-on. 122 00:06:29,553 --> 00:06:30,928 Hold Mommy's hand, girls. 123 00:06:35,636 --> 00:06:38,470 No way. A check for $825? 124 00:06:38,470 --> 00:06:40,220 $825? 125 00:06:40,220 --> 00:06:42,761 What? Give me that. 126 00:06:44,012 --> 00:06:47,429 "Tax credit," blah, blah, blah. 127 00:06:47,429 --> 00:06:49,470 From when I worked at the nursing home? 128 00:06:49,470 --> 00:06:51,511 I vote Jet Ski. 129 00:06:51,511 --> 00:06:53,220 And I vote no! 130 00:06:53,220 --> 00:06:55,803 Come on, girls. We got to go to school. 131 00:06:55,803 --> 00:06:57,678 - Kev, you coming? - Yeah. 132 00:06:57,678 --> 00:06:59,262 - Kev! - Shh. 133 00:06:59,262 --> 00:07:03,220 - Come on, girls. - Let me have this. 134 00:07:10,553 --> 00:07:11,553 Mickey? 135 00:07:13,012 --> 00:07:15,262 Mickey! Hey, come on out. Cops are gone. 136 00:07:18,095 --> 00:07:19,928 The fuck they want? 137 00:07:19,928 --> 00:07:22,179 Paula's dead. 138 00:07:22,179 --> 00:07:25,137 No shit. Is it Christmas? 139 00:07:25,137 --> 00:07:26,678 It's not funny. 140 00:07:26,678 --> 00:07:28,845 Someone threw her out a window. 141 00:07:28,845 --> 00:07:30,429 You kidding me? That's extremely funny. 142 00:07:30,429 --> 00:07:31,678 There's, like, a fucking verb for that 143 00:07:31,678 --> 00:07:33,179 I-I'm serious, Mickey. 144 00:07:33,179 --> 00:07:36,595 They want us to go into the station for questioning. 145 00:07:36,595 --> 00:07:38,470 You know anything about this? 146 00:07:38,470 --> 00:07:40,970 Nah. Fuck, no. I didn't kill her. 147 00:07:40,970 --> 00:07:42,553 Wait. Do you know something about this? 148 00:07:42,553 --> 00:07:44,595 No. 149 00:07:44,595 --> 00:07:47,429 - That what you're telling me? - Of course not. 150 00:07:47,429 --> 00:07:48,803 Got it. 151 00:07:48,803 --> 00:07:50,761 Good strategy. 152 00:07:50,761 --> 00:07:53,095 Wait, what stra-- I-I didn't kill her. 153 00:07:53,095 --> 00:07:55,511 - Little bit, you did, though. - No. Not little bit. 154 00:07:55,511 --> 00:07:58,304 I did zero murdering of my PO last night, Mickey. 155 00:07:58,304 --> 00:08:00,262 - Okay. - I'm not the one 156 00:08:00,262 --> 00:08:02,262 who came home late without any sort of explanation. 157 00:08:02,262 --> 00:08:04,220 I did explain. I was with my dad. 158 00:08:04,220 --> 00:08:06,761 No. You didn't explain why you were with your dad. 159 00:08:06,761 --> 00:08:08,803 Exactly. 160 00:08:08,803 --> 00:08:10,220 Okay, so, to be clear, you didn't kill her, 161 00:08:10,220 --> 00:08:13,220 or, you know, you "didn't" kill her"? 162 00:08:13,220 --> 00:08:14,678 Why are you putting shit in weird fucking air quotes? 163 00:08:14,678 --> 00:08:15,720 Because I didn't fucking kill her. 164 00:08:15,720 --> 00:08:17,845 Okay. Me neither. 165 00:08:17,845 --> 00:08:20,511 We both know what we know we know... 166 00:08:20,511 --> 00:08:21,470 that we know. 167 00:08:23,345 --> 00:08:25,220 What the fuck does that mean? 168 00:08:25,220 --> 00:08:26,803 - Hey. Where you going? 169 00:08:26,803 --> 00:08:28,179 Wouldn't you like to know? 170 00:08:28,179 --> 00:08:30,553 I-I-I would. 171 00:08:30,553 --> 00:08:33,012 I would like to know! 172 00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:34,887 All right. Pick your poison. 173 00:08:34,887 --> 00:08:36,636 - Cereal or toast. - Pass. 174 00:08:36,636 --> 00:08:39,053 Todd's biggest game of the season is today. 175 00:08:39,053 --> 00:08:41,262 Got to stay sharp, stay hungry. 176 00:08:41,262 --> 00:08:43,220 Shouldn't you be doing fun kid stuff this summer? 177 00:08:43,220 --> 00:08:45,803 Like Slip 'N Slide in the yard? 178 00:08:45,803 --> 00:08:47,803 Talent management is fun, Tami, 179 00:08:47,803 --> 00:08:49,845 if it's the kill that you love. 180 00:08:49,845 --> 00:08:51,053 - Excuse me. 181 00:08:51,053 --> 00:08:52,387 It's the coast. 182 00:08:52,387 --> 00:08:53,387 Go for Todd. 183 00:08:55,720 --> 00:08:57,429 Good. You're still here. 184 00:08:57,429 --> 00:08:58,387 - Hey. - I need to talk to you. 185 00:08:58,387 --> 00:09:00,345 Uh, okay. 186 00:09:00,345 --> 00:09:02,887 I met this awesome woman last night at a hotel bar, right? 187 00:09:02,887 --> 00:09:04,262 - Okay. Yeah. - Claudia. 188 00:09:04,262 --> 00:09:07,220 She's older than me, but not in a rape-y way. 189 00:09:07,220 --> 00:09:09,720 She's got this beautiful smile and these bright eyes 190 00:09:09,720 --> 00:09:12,387 and these sexy little Lisa Loeb glasses. 191 00:09:12,387 --> 00:09:14,220 Debs. Hey. 192 00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:16,304 So, anyways, we spent the night together last night. 193 00:09:16,304 --> 00:09:19,387 - Yeah. - And then she gave me this. 194 00:09:21,429 --> 00:09:22,845 I'm really confused. 195 00:09:22,845 --> 00:09:23,887 Why would she give me 1,000 bucks? 196 00:09:23,887 --> 00:09:25,720 Um... 197 00:09:25,720 --> 00:09:27,304 I'm not. She, uh-- 198 00:09:27,304 --> 00:09:29,803 She thinks you're a prostitute. 199 00:09:29,803 --> 00:09:31,429 - What? - Yeah. 200 00:09:31,429 --> 00:09:33,345 But it was voluntary hooking up. 201 00:09:33,345 --> 00:09:35,470 I liked the sex. I think she did, too. 202 00:09:35,470 --> 00:09:37,304 Yeah. I like fixing bikes. 203 00:09:37,304 --> 00:09:39,429 But it's my job because someone gives me cash to do it. 204 00:09:39,429 --> 00:09:42,137 - But we really hit it off. 205 00:09:42,137 --> 00:09:44,970 It wasn't like a gross sex worker situation at all. 206 00:09:44,970 --> 00:09:46,387 Who's a sex worker? 207 00:09:46,387 --> 00:09:47,678 - Debbie. - No. 208 00:09:47,678 --> 00:09:48,970 This is a misunderstanding 209 00:09:48,970 --> 00:09:50,470 that will be cleared up immediately. 210 00:09:50,470 --> 00:09:52,262 Okay. 211 00:09:52,262 --> 00:09:53,928 - Tami. - Yeah? 212 00:09:53,928 --> 00:09:55,595 Could you wake up Franny in 20 minutes 213 00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:56,595 and watch her till I get back? 214 00:09:56,595 --> 00:09:58,345 I can for a little while, 215 00:09:58,345 --> 00:10:00,304 but then I got to take Fred to daycare, get to work by noon. 216 00:10:00,304 --> 00:10:01,803 - Cool. I owe you. - Wait, wait, wait, Debs. 217 00:10:01,803 --> 00:10:03,511 How much do you owe her? 218 00:10:03,511 --> 00:10:04,803 Because you have to be clear about terms up front. 219 00:10:04,803 --> 00:10:06,387 - Shut up, dick. - You know? 220 00:10:07,595 --> 00:10:09,053 Oh, thank fuck you're here. 221 00:10:09,053 --> 00:10:10,179 - Hey. - I need to talk you. 222 00:10:10,179 --> 00:10:13,053 - You're popular this morning. - Yeah. 223 00:10:13,053 --> 00:10:16,137 Hey, Tami, uh, it's kind of a brothers-only situation. 224 00:10:19,553 --> 00:10:22,720 Thanks. 225 00:10:22,720 --> 00:10:25,845 What's up? 226 00:10:25,845 --> 00:10:27,887 I think Mickey killed our parole officer. 227 00:10:27,887 --> 00:10:29,470 - You what? - Yeah. 228 00:10:29,470 --> 00:10:31,636 She got thrown out a window last night, 229 00:10:31,636 --> 00:10:34,553 and he hates her, and he was out late. 230 00:10:34,553 --> 00:10:36,387 Plus, he's a psychopath, so... 231 00:10:36,387 --> 00:10:37,678 Yeah, but you-you really think 232 00:10:37,678 --> 00:10:39,304 Mickey would kill a parole officer? 233 00:10:39,304 --> 00:10:40,803 We just had this whole conversation 234 00:10:40,803 --> 00:10:42,470 where he said he basically did it, 235 00:10:42,470 --> 00:10:45,095 you know, in his Mickey way of not saying he did it 236 00:10:45,095 --> 00:10:46,012 but totally saying he did it. 237 00:10:46,012 --> 00:10:47,720 - You know? - No. 238 00:10:47,720 --> 00:10:49,470 Well, I don't know what the fuck to do. 239 00:10:49,470 --> 00:10:51,470 I mean, I'm supposed to make a statement to the police, 240 00:10:51,470 --> 00:10:52,970 and--I mean, do I lie and say he was here all night? 241 00:10:52,970 --> 00:10:54,179 - Or-- - Yes. 242 00:10:54,179 --> 00:10:55,845 You're a Gallagher, right? 243 00:10:55,845 --> 00:10:57,012 Always lie. 244 00:11:00,845 --> 00:11:02,387 Why are you squirming so much? 245 00:11:02,387 --> 00:11:03,887 - Something wrong with you? - I'm not squirming. 246 00:11:03,887 --> 00:11:05,179 The point is, V, 247 00:11:05,179 --> 00:11:06,678 when you have the money, you got to spend it. 248 00:11:06,678 --> 00:11:09,012 - Five-dollar scratchers. - No, Kev. 249 00:11:09,012 --> 00:11:10,845 But we have $800. 250 00:11:10,845 --> 00:11:12,720 We could buy a million five-dollar scratchers. 251 00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:14,678 What about Disneyland, 252 00:11:14,678 --> 00:11:16,678 a once-in-a-lifetime experience for our children? 253 00:11:16,678 --> 00:11:18,678 Fuck that mouse. 254 00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:20,845 I'll take another Sea Breeze, please. 255 00:11:20,845 --> 00:11:23,429 Or we go to the Indian casino, and we double down on craps. 256 00:11:23,429 --> 00:11:25,970 Let it ride. 257 00:11:25,970 --> 00:11:27,387 What do real people do with money? 258 00:11:27,387 --> 00:11:28,720 That's what I want to do. 259 00:11:28,720 --> 00:11:30,636 - Invest it. - In what? 260 00:11:30,636 --> 00:11:32,345 You know who you should talk to? 261 00:11:32,345 --> 00:11:35,304 My buddy Gerald's daughter. She is a money genius. 262 00:11:35,304 --> 00:11:37,553 She--she invested in this Korean company, 263 00:11:37,553 --> 00:11:39,928 selling their products from home. 264 00:11:39,928 --> 00:11:42,220 Now she's got a Mercedes. 265 00:11:42,220 --> 00:11:43,553 I want a Mercedes. 266 00:11:43,553 --> 00:11:45,304 We could sell Korean stuff, V. 267 00:11:45,304 --> 00:11:47,053 We could sell the shit out of Korean stuff. 268 00:11:47,053 --> 00:11:48,220 We don't have a ton to invest. 269 00:11:48,220 --> 00:11:49,553 Well, neither did she. 270 00:11:49,553 --> 00:11:51,636 She was a waitress. 271 00:11:51,636 --> 00:11:53,137 Want me to get her number for you? 272 00:11:53,137 --> 00:11:54,845 - Good morrow, friends. 273 00:11:54,845 --> 00:11:57,553 Chums. Old pals. 274 00:11:57,553 --> 00:11:59,179 I'm gonna use the ladies' room. 275 00:11:59,179 --> 00:12:00,887 - Hurry back, bunny. 276 00:12:00,887 --> 00:12:02,636 Mm, hop, hop, hop. 277 00:12:05,470 --> 00:12:07,429 Is it a beautiful morning or what? 278 00:12:07,429 --> 00:12:09,678 - Stop gloating, Frank. - Oh, shut up. 279 00:12:09,678 --> 00:12:12,262 You and the lady friend are getting tight, huh, Frank? 280 00:12:12,262 --> 00:12:13,636 Wait. I don't care. 281 00:12:15,304 --> 00:12:17,345 We are getting tight, V. Thank you for asking. 282 00:12:17,345 --> 00:12:20,304 Only thing that's a little bit odd is, 283 00:12:20,304 --> 00:12:22,470 she appears to live in a Rolls-Royce. 284 00:12:22,470 --> 00:12:24,179 A Rolls? 285 00:12:24,179 --> 00:12:25,429 You see, I don't want her to feel uncomfortable 286 00:12:25,429 --> 00:12:26,429 that she's homeless. 287 00:12:26,429 --> 00:12:28,179 We've all been there. 288 00:12:28,179 --> 00:12:29,511 - Never. - We've never been there. 289 00:12:29,511 --> 00:12:31,262 I'm probably homeless right now. 290 00:12:31,262 --> 00:12:33,012 Got to check with the kids about that. 291 00:12:33,012 --> 00:12:35,137 Are you sure she's homeless, Frank? 292 00:12:35,137 --> 00:12:36,429 The Rolls-Royce doesn't make sense. 293 00:12:36,429 --> 00:12:37,678 Yeah, have you actually asked her, 294 00:12:37,678 --> 00:12:39,970 "Do you have a house, Faye?" 295 00:12:39,970 --> 00:12:42,761 Got to play the long game with a woman like this. 296 00:12:42,761 --> 00:12:45,970 Let her dole out the info at her own pace. 297 00:12:45,970 --> 00:12:47,636 Peel back the onion 298 00:12:47,636 --> 00:12:50,470 and reveal her ripe fruit to me when she's ready. 299 00:12:53,220 --> 00:12:54,720 Hey, Faye, do you have a house? 300 00:12:54,720 --> 00:12:56,095 Yes. Why? 301 00:13:02,511 --> 00:13:03,678 Staff meeting. 302 00:13:04,678 --> 00:13:06,720 Now in session. 303 00:13:07,761 --> 00:13:09,012 All right. 304 00:13:09,012 --> 00:13:10,928 We got a special today. 305 00:13:10,928 --> 00:13:12,887 Shrimp tater tots. 306 00:13:12,887 --> 00:13:14,845 Part tater, part shrimp. 307 00:13:14,845 --> 00:13:16,137 I'ma throw up. 308 00:13:16,137 --> 00:13:18,470 Looks like you fried a turd, Lori. 309 00:13:18,470 --> 00:13:20,387 Serving these beauties up with a slice of lemon 310 00:13:20,387 --> 00:13:23,179 and a dollop of tartar jizz. 311 00:13:23,179 --> 00:13:25,720 Seven-fifty with a combo drink and fries. 312 00:13:25,720 --> 00:13:27,262 Jesus. 313 00:13:29,137 --> 00:13:31,345 You getting all this, Carl? Hello? 314 00:13:31,345 --> 00:13:34,387 - Yeah. I got it. - What's wrong with you? 315 00:13:34,387 --> 00:13:36,179 He's questioning his life choices. 316 00:13:36,179 --> 00:13:38,345 Going through his "wants to do good for the world" phase. 317 00:13:38,345 --> 00:13:39,845 It'll pass. 318 00:13:39,845 --> 00:13:41,095 Why would you want to do good? 319 00:13:41,095 --> 00:13:43,262 I don't know. 320 00:13:43,262 --> 00:13:47,012 Guess it felt good saving lives and fixing streetlights. 321 00:13:47,012 --> 00:13:49,095 Felt like I had a purpose on this earth, you know? 322 00:13:49,095 --> 00:13:50,553 - Join the military. - I can't. 323 00:13:50,553 --> 00:13:51,970 I'm banned. 324 00:13:51,970 --> 00:13:53,553 So gain 50 pounds and be a cop, then. 325 00:13:53,553 --> 00:13:55,678 I'm too young to apply. 326 00:13:55,678 --> 00:13:58,470 Guess this is my fate-- serving shrimp taters. 327 00:14:00,553 --> 00:14:02,511 Let me tell you something, Carl. 328 00:14:02,511 --> 00:14:04,928 You think I always wanted to do this with my life? 329 00:14:04,928 --> 00:14:07,636 Serving up fried turd balls with a bunch of ex-cons? 330 00:14:07,636 --> 00:14:09,636 I'm a vet, Lori. Two tours! 331 00:14:09,636 --> 00:14:12,470 This wasn't my dream. I wanted to be a teacher. 332 00:14:13,595 --> 00:14:18,387 But cocaine tasted so good, I just did that instead. 333 00:14:18,387 --> 00:14:19,553 The point is, you got to have dreams. 334 00:14:19,553 --> 00:14:21,304 Go be a cop. 335 00:14:21,304 --> 00:14:23,220 Can't apply till I'm 21. 336 00:14:23,220 --> 00:14:25,220 Uh, you ever heard of faking a birth certificate 337 00:14:25,220 --> 00:14:26,720 using a dead guy's name? 338 00:14:38,511 --> 00:14:41,095 Some big people here today. Am I right? 339 00:14:41,095 --> 00:14:43,137 - Yep. - Whose your boy? 340 00:14:43,137 --> 00:14:44,595 Sixteen. 341 00:14:44,595 --> 00:14:46,220 You got Todd Bryerson? 342 00:14:46,220 --> 00:14:48,012 Nice. 343 00:14:48,012 --> 00:14:49,137 I'm with 22. 344 00:14:49,137 --> 00:14:51,636 Cordel Jackson. 345 00:14:51,636 --> 00:14:55,137 Yeah, we're positioning him to take a third endorsement today. 346 00:14:55,137 --> 00:14:57,595 Timbo Keller, RCE Sports Management. 347 00:14:57,595 --> 00:14:59,470 - And you are? - You're not poaching my boy. 348 00:14:59,470 --> 00:15:01,595 Whoa, little man. I was just gonna say-- 349 00:15:01,595 --> 00:15:02,803 Walk away. 350 00:15:02,803 --> 00:15:04,595 - Wow. You're paranoid. - I've seen you eye him. 351 00:15:04,595 --> 00:15:05,595 Walk away. 352 00:15:12,304 --> 00:15:14,429 Listen, buddy. Got a strategy. 353 00:15:14,429 --> 00:15:15,928 Check it. 354 00:15:15,928 --> 00:15:18,095 The new Apollos? Not out yet. 355 00:15:18,095 --> 00:15:20,012 They're gonna be huge. 356 00:15:20,012 --> 00:15:22,137 New lace technology. 357 00:15:22,137 --> 00:15:24,179 Self-tightens. 358 00:15:24,179 --> 00:15:25,387 Apollos? 359 00:15:25,387 --> 00:15:27,304 That's all you can get me? 360 00:15:27,304 --> 00:15:29,095 Cordel's got Air Jordans, and RCE signed him. 361 00:15:29,095 --> 00:15:30,845 Trust me. 362 00:15:30,845 --> 00:15:34,053 Get photographed in these. Boom, leverage. 363 00:15:34,053 --> 00:15:35,970 What's leverage? 364 00:15:35,970 --> 00:15:37,678 Don't worry about it. 365 00:15:37,678 --> 00:15:40,137 Trust me. 366 00:15:56,137 --> 00:15:58,304 Hey, Officer Berto. Can we talk for a second? 367 00:15:58,304 --> 00:15:59,761 I haven't seen your dad. Buzz off. 368 00:15:59,761 --> 00:16:01,387 Wait, wait. It's not about my dad. 369 00:16:01,387 --> 00:16:03,304 - It's about lawyers. - Worse. 370 00:16:03,304 --> 00:16:05,553 - I'm on my break. - Great. 371 00:16:12,095 --> 00:16:13,678 When you got arrested 372 00:16:13,678 --> 00:16:16,345 for beating the shit out of that Cardinals fan, 373 00:16:16,345 --> 00:16:18,053 who was the lawyer that got you off? 374 00:16:18,053 --> 00:16:19,012 Danny Alvarez. 375 00:16:19,012 --> 00:16:21,179 Best lawyer around. 376 00:16:21,179 --> 00:16:23,887 Five hundred an hour. Worth every penny. 377 00:16:23,887 --> 00:16:25,678 Yeah, I thought I was fucked when Tina wouldn't marry me, 378 00:16:25,678 --> 00:16:27,220 but Danny saved my ass. 379 00:16:27,220 --> 00:16:30,012 Got me off scot-free. 380 00:16:30,012 --> 00:16:31,553 Wouldn't marry you? 381 00:16:31,553 --> 00:16:33,220 What's that got to do with anything? 382 00:16:33,220 --> 00:16:34,845 Oh, 'cause married people can't testify 383 00:16:34,845 --> 00:16:36,220 against each other in a court of law. 384 00:16:36,220 --> 00:16:38,511 It's called spousal privilege. 385 00:16:38,511 --> 00:16:40,137 That's why I tried to get Tina to marry me, 386 00:16:40,137 --> 00:16:41,928 but the bitch said, no, she wouldn't cover for me. 387 00:16:41,928 --> 00:16:43,761 So I had to hire Danny. 388 00:16:43,761 --> 00:16:45,928 Married people can't testify against each other? Ever? 389 00:16:45,928 --> 00:16:46,887 Nope. 390 00:16:46,887 --> 00:16:48,553 Any knowledge you have 391 00:16:48,553 --> 00:16:50,511 of each other's shit is strictly confidential. 392 00:16:50,511 --> 00:16:52,511 It's what we in the biz call a loophole. 393 00:16:55,887 --> 00:16:57,053 What's his blood type? 394 00:16:58,636 --> 00:16:59,970 What? They need to know his blood type 395 00:16:59,970 --> 00:17:01,553 so he can do tummy time? 396 00:17:01,553 --> 00:17:02,803 Mm. 397 00:17:02,803 --> 00:17:05,012 I'm just gonna put "red." 398 00:17:07,095 --> 00:17:09,179 Who's his emergency contact? 399 00:17:09,179 --> 00:17:10,928 That's easy. Me. 400 00:17:10,928 --> 00:17:13,678 Who are they supposed to call if we're both unreachable 401 00:17:13,678 --> 00:17:15,137 and Fred's having a seizure? 402 00:17:15,137 --> 00:17:16,553 Seizure? Jesus. 403 00:17:16,553 --> 00:17:18,511 What are they gonna do to him in this place? 404 00:17:18,511 --> 00:17:20,095 Cami. 405 00:17:20,095 --> 00:17:22,053 No. Your sister? No. No, no, no. 406 00:17:22,053 --> 00:17:23,553 Uh...Ian. 407 00:17:23,553 --> 00:17:25,595 Ian the felon? 408 00:17:25,595 --> 00:17:27,887 Uh, uh, Debbie, then. 409 00:17:27,887 --> 00:17:28,887 The prostitute. 410 00:17:28,887 --> 00:17:31,678 Okay. Um... 411 00:17:31,678 --> 00:17:34,012 look, why don't we just leave it blank, huh? 412 00:17:34,012 --> 00:17:36,928 You can't leave it blank. So Cami. 413 00:17:38,887 --> 00:17:41,220 She and Brad are gonna be Fred's legal guardians anyway. 414 00:17:41,220 --> 00:17:42,595 What? Since when? 415 00:17:44,053 --> 00:17:46,053 Why wouldn't they be? 416 00:17:46,053 --> 00:17:48,595 Uh, because Brad fell off the wagon so hard 417 00:17:48,595 --> 00:17:50,304 that we had to pick him up out of a ditch last year, 418 00:17:50,304 --> 00:17:51,595 and you hate your sister? 419 00:17:53,095 --> 00:17:55,345 - I don't hate my sister. - Yes, you do. 420 00:17:55,345 --> 00:17:56,595 And we all do. 421 00:17:57,887 --> 00:18:01,304 Fine. Um, my Aunt Oopie, then. 422 00:18:01,304 --> 00:18:02,970 Aunt Oop--no. Fuck, no. What? 423 00:18:02,970 --> 00:18:04,429 Okay. 424 00:18:04,429 --> 00:18:06,761 Who did you have in mind to be Fred's legal guardian? 425 00:18:11,012 --> 00:18:13,304 I don't know. Can we just do this later? 426 00:18:13,304 --> 00:18:15,262 A Gallagher, though, right? 427 00:18:15,262 --> 00:18:17,095 Honestly, I hadn't even thought about it. 428 00:18:18,511 --> 00:18:20,304 Bye, buddy! 429 00:18:20,304 --> 00:18:21,970 Hey. We will be talking about this later. 430 00:18:21,970 --> 00:18:22,887 Yes. 431 00:18:22,887 --> 00:18:24,595 - Bye! 432 00:18:27,137 --> 00:18:28,179 Debbie? 433 00:18:28,179 --> 00:18:30,761 Hey. Uh... 434 00:18:30,761 --> 00:18:33,887 I was just wondering why you gave me this last night. 435 00:18:33,887 --> 00:18:35,803 Oh, I'm sorry. Was it not enough? 436 00:18:35,803 --> 00:18:38,345 Here, come in. Come in. 437 00:18:38,345 --> 00:18:39,845 Just, um-- my wallet's right over there. 438 00:18:39,845 --> 00:18:41,511 Just take whatever your rate is. 439 00:18:41,511 --> 00:18:42,845 - I wasn't sure. 440 00:18:42,845 --> 00:18:45,304 Claudia, I don't have a rate. 441 00:18:45,304 --> 00:18:46,845 I'm not a prostitute. 442 00:18:46,845 --> 00:18:48,845 You're not? 443 00:18:48,845 --> 00:18:50,387 Why were you sitting with all the prostitutes, then? 444 00:18:50,387 --> 00:18:52,137 You know, they call that Ho Corner. 445 00:18:52,137 --> 00:18:55,137 I did not know that. 446 00:18:55,137 --> 00:18:57,970 I just met you, and I thought I liked you. 447 00:18:59,262 --> 00:19:00,887 So I was a freebie? 448 00:19:00,887 --> 00:19:02,845 No, you weren't a freebie, 449 00:19:02,845 --> 00:19:05,511 because you're not a john and I'm not a prostitute. 450 00:19:05,511 --> 00:19:06,928 I just thought we hit it off. 451 00:19:06,928 --> 00:19:09,220 Oh! 452 00:19:09,220 --> 00:19:11,511 Well, I thought we had a connection, too. 453 00:19:11,511 --> 00:19:14,179 So this is a misunderstanding? 454 00:19:14,179 --> 00:19:16,387 Big mistake. Huge. 455 00:19:16,387 --> 00:19:17,470 Great. 456 00:19:17,470 --> 00:19:19,761 Um, I have to get to work, 457 00:19:19,761 --> 00:19:23,429 but can I take you out on a proper date later? 458 00:19:23,429 --> 00:19:25,595 Sure. 459 00:19:25,595 --> 00:19:27,387 How long are you in town? 460 00:19:27,387 --> 00:19:29,429 I live here. Up in Lake Forest. 461 00:19:29,429 --> 00:19:31,678 I just get a hotel room 462 00:19:31,678 --> 00:19:33,553 when I have a late meeting in the city 463 00:19:33,553 --> 00:19:36,387 or I'm too fucked up on, you know, and looking for a... 464 00:19:37,595 --> 00:19:40,429 So, uh, dinner? 465 00:19:40,429 --> 00:19:43,095 How about seven o'clock tonight? 466 00:19:43,095 --> 00:19:45,012 - Sure. Sounds good. - Okay. 467 00:19:45,012 --> 00:19:46,553 And here, I'm gonna return this. 468 00:19:46,553 --> 00:19:48,803 Oh, no, no, no. Keep it, as a gift. 469 00:19:48,803 --> 00:19:50,636 It's the least I can do for insulting you. 470 00:19:50,636 --> 00:19:52,137 Oh! 471 00:19:52,137 --> 00:19:54,553 And if you're free today, 472 00:19:54,553 --> 00:19:56,511 why don't you just enjoy the room? 473 00:19:56,511 --> 00:19:57,803 I mean, I have to go to work, 474 00:19:57,803 --> 00:19:59,179 but I can arrange for a late checkout. 475 00:19:59,179 --> 00:20:00,720 I mean, just order up some room service 476 00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:02,553 or a spa treatment. 477 00:20:03,720 --> 00:20:05,053 Well, thanks. 478 00:20:09,970 --> 00:20:11,595 I don't understand. 479 00:20:11,595 --> 00:20:14,511 If you have a house, why didn't we sleep in it? 480 00:20:14,511 --> 00:20:17,511 It's embarrassing. 481 00:20:17,511 --> 00:20:20,553 You'll think I'm crazy. 482 00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:24,761 There is zero percent chance that I'll think you're crazy. 483 00:20:24,761 --> 00:20:27,678 What's embarrassing? You got bedbugs? 484 00:20:27,678 --> 00:20:29,761 You know what? Let's change the subject. 485 00:20:29,761 --> 00:20:30,803 Come on. 486 00:20:30,803 --> 00:20:32,095 Tell Frank. 487 00:20:32,095 --> 00:20:33,595 You got a husband back home? 488 00:20:33,595 --> 00:20:35,761 Much worse than that. 489 00:20:35,761 --> 00:20:37,179 Children? 490 00:20:37,179 --> 00:20:39,511 It's haunted, Frank. 491 00:20:39,511 --> 00:20:42,053 I'm terrified to be there alone. 492 00:20:42,053 --> 00:20:44,595 That's why I sleep in my car. 493 00:20:44,595 --> 00:20:46,928 "Haunted"? 494 00:20:46,928 --> 00:20:48,845 Every floor, 495 00:20:48,845 --> 00:20:50,887 every room, 496 00:20:50,887 --> 00:20:53,761 including the ballroom and servants' quarters. 497 00:20:53,761 --> 00:20:56,887 How big is this house? 498 00:20:56,887 --> 00:20:59,387 Twenty-two thousand nine hundred eleven square feet. 499 00:20:59,387 --> 00:21:01,470 On the lake. 500 00:21:01,470 --> 00:21:03,803 Nine bedrooms, including the master. 501 00:21:03,803 --> 00:21:05,928 But that's mostly just storage 502 00:21:05,928 --> 00:21:08,137 for my father's single-malt scotch collection. 503 00:21:09,595 --> 00:21:11,636 Your father collects scotch? 504 00:21:11,636 --> 00:21:13,429 Did. Yes. 505 00:21:13,429 --> 00:21:15,012 He's dead now. 506 00:21:15,012 --> 00:21:18,220 He has hundreds of bottles of the stuff in that room. 507 00:21:18,220 --> 00:21:19,970 I mean... 508 00:21:19,970 --> 00:21:22,845 Not that I'm brave enough to go in there. 509 00:21:22,845 --> 00:21:26,761 You know, Faye, I believe in ghosts. 510 00:21:26,761 --> 00:21:29,345 I see them. I hear them. 511 00:21:29,345 --> 00:21:31,553 And I can exorcise them. 512 00:21:31,553 --> 00:21:33,553 We're simpatico. 513 00:21:33,553 --> 00:21:35,553 I could help you get rid of 'em for good. 514 00:21:36,803 --> 00:21:37,803 Really? 515 00:21:39,470 --> 00:21:41,137 Who else you gonna call? 516 00:22:01,345 --> 00:22:02,803 Ladies and gentlemen, 517 00:22:02,803 --> 00:22:05,053 let's all stand for the national anthem. 518 00:22:20,345 --> 00:22:22,678 "Southside Kid Finally Takes a Stand." 519 00:22:25,678 --> 00:22:26,678 Boom. 520 00:22:30,220 --> 00:22:32,511 Man, let me ask you something. 521 00:22:32,511 --> 00:22:34,553 Who's your kid's guardian? 522 00:22:34,553 --> 00:22:36,845 You, I think. 523 00:22:36,845 --> 00:22:39,095 No. I'm just kidding. 524 00:22:39,095 --> 00:22:42,595 It's, uh, some Bible-thumping aunt on Cami's side. 525 00:22:42,595 --> 00:22:44,220 Oh, and you're okay with that? 526 00:22:44,220 --> 00:22:47,095 I mean, it not being someone in your own family? 527 00:22:47,095 --> 00:22:49,595 You've clearly never met my family. 528 00:22:49,595 --> 00:22:51,887 Guardian stuff's up to the mother anyway. 529 00:22:51,887 --> 00:22:53,761 Everything is. 530 00:22:53,761 --> 00:22:56,470 Sooner you accept that, the better your life will be. 531 00:22:56,470 --> 00:22:58,511 Remote control, up to her. 532 00:22:58,511 --> 00:23:00,553 Temperature of every room, up to her. 533 00:23:00,553 --> 00:23:01,511 Your balls, up to her. 534 00:23:03,220 --> 00:23:04,470 Oh. 535 00:23:07,678 --> 00:23:09,470 Yo. What's up? 536 00:23:09,470 --> 00:23:11,511 Hey. The new daycare wouldn't take Fred. 537 00:23:11,511 --> 00:23:13,220 What? 538 00:23:13,220 --> 00:23:15,511 The daycare wouldn't take Fred because of his rash. 539 00:23:15,511 --> 00:23:16,678 Oh. Is that right? 540 00:23:16,678 --> 00:23:18,845 Well, not his rash, 541 00:23:18,845 --> 00:23:21,012 but because of his stupid rash, they took his temperature, 542 00:23:21,012 --> 00:23:23,137 and it's point-two degrees higher than it should be, 543 00:23:23,137 --> 00:23:25,387 so they sent him home. 544 00:23:25,387 --> 00:23:26,636 Okay. Where are you now? 545 00:23:26,636 --> 00:23:28,636 Uh, I'm almost home. 546 00:23:28,636 --> 00:23:30,595 Aunt Oopie is meeting me there, and then, hopefully, 547 00:23:30,595 --> 00:23:32,179 I will still make it to work on time. 548 00:23:32,179 --> 00:23:34,636 Oh, your-your-your aunt I've never met? 549 00:23:34,636 --> 00:23:35,928 She's available. 550 00:23:35,928 --> 00:23:37,845 You know, you can meet her when you get home. 551 00:23:37,845 --> 00:23:38,887 Oh, and can you pick up some baby aspirin? 552 00:23:38,887 --> 00:23:40,304 Mwah. 553 00:23:40,304 --> 00:23:43,012 Ah, f...uck me. 554 00:23:46,012 --> 00:23:47,928 We're getting close. 555 00:23:47,928 --> 00:23:50,595 Oh, Frank. 556 00:23:50,595 --> 00:23:53,720 I'm in a cold sweat. 557 00:23:53,720 --> 00:23:56,387 Let's talk about these spirits for a second. 558 00:23:56,387 --> 00:23:58,803 Uh, can you see them, or are they more of a presence? 559 00:23:58,803 --> 00:24:00,179 A presence. 560 00:24:00,179 --> 00:24:02,970 Like a cold hand on my neck. 561 00:24:02,970 --> 00:24:04,887 Okay. Right here. 562 00:24:08,179 --> 00:24:11,970 It's the worst when I'm in bed. 563 00:24:11,970 --> 00:24:14,345 They hover over me. 564 00:24:14,345 --> 00:24:16,887 Oh, God. 565 00:24:16,887 --> 00:24:18,928 Oh, God. 566 00:24:20,761 --> 00:24:22,137 Fr... 567 00:24:22,137 --> 00:24:23,595 I-I-I... 568 00:24:23,595 --> 00:24:25,429 I can't do this. 569 00:24:25,429 --> 00:24:27,012 Give me your hand. 570 00:24:27,012 --> 00:24:28,928 It's like our black president said, 571 00:24:28,928 --> 00:24:30,928 "Yes, we can." 572 00:24:30,928 --> 00:24:32,304 Come on. 573 00:24:32,304 --> 00:24:35,470 Come on. Come on. 574 00:24:35,470 --> 00:24:39,262 It's just a house. 575 00:24:39,262 --> 00:24:43,095 A very expensive house, but nothing we can't handle. 576 00:24:57,887 --> 00:24:59,511 Let's start 577 00:24:59,511 --> 00:25:01,511 with the scotch-collection room and go from there. 578 00:25:01,511 --> 00:25:02,511 Which way? 579 00:25:02,511 --> 00:25:03,970 Up the stairs. 580 00:25:03,970 --> 00:25:06,345 Uh, for whatever it's worth, 581 00:25:06,345 --> 00:25:10,137 my spidey sense is really not picking up any spirits. 582 00:25:10,137 --> 00:25:11,179 Right? 583 00:25:11,179 --> 00:25:13,970 No ghosts in here, right? 584 00:25:13,970 --> 00:25:15,095 I can't. 585 00:25:15,095 --> 00:25:16,678 I literally can't go up the stairs, Frank. 586 00:25:16,678 --> 00:25:18,262 Faye, take my hand. 587 00:25:18,262 --> 00:25:21,053 I want you to really hear what I'm about to tell you. 588 00:25:21,053 --> 00:25:22,553 I've got you. 589 00:25:22,553 --> 00:25:24,137 And you're safe with me. 590 00:25:28,012 --> 00:25:29,595 Aw. 591 00:25:29,595 --> 00:25:32,429 Is that you? 592 00:25:32,429 --> 00:25:34,345 Yes. 593 00:25:34,345 --> 00:25:37,137 At high-school graduation... 594 00:25:37,137 --> 00:25:39,928 right before everything changed forever... 595 00:25:39,928 --> 00:25:41,887 when my life still had promise. 596 00:25:52,761 --> 00:25:54,970 - You're late. Grab an AK. 597 00:25:54,970 --> 00:25:56,179 - What's up, Mickey? - Hey, the large file 598 00:25:56,179 --> 00:25:58,137 works best on serial numbers. 599 00:25:58,137 --> 00:26:00,803 Yo, I heard about that bitch PO going down. 600 00:26:00,803 --> 00:26:03,387 Yeah, who's the lucky parolee that gets that trophy? 601 00:26:03,387 --> 00:26:05,179 I bet he's loving life right now. 602 00:26:05,179 --> 00:26:06,803 Why you make me ask you twice? 603 00:26:06,803 --> 00:26:08,470 Sit. File. 604 00:26:08,470 --> 00:26:10,345 I'm not really here to work, Pops. 605 00:26:10,345 --> 00:26:12,012 "Not here to work," he says. 606 00:26:12,012 --> 00:26:13,387 You helped us move 'em last night. 607 00:26:13,387 --> 00:26:15,970 - Now you got cold feet? - No. I just... 608 00:26:15,970 --> 00:26:18,928 I need advice, actually. 609 00:26:18,928 --> 00:26:20,803 - What the fuck? - Yeah, I know. 610 00:26:20,803 --> 00:26:23,095 Look, I'm pretty sure Ian popped that PO. 611 00:26:23,095 --> 00:26:24,887 Who's Ian? 612 00:26:24,887 --> 00:26:26,928 Fuck you, man. Don't start with that shit. 613 00:26:26,928 --> 00:26:28,720 Hey, I'm just fucking with you. 614 00:26:28,720 --> 00:26:31,429 No way in hell that little gay carrot boy shot her. 615 00:26:31,429 --> 00:26:32,761 No. She didn't get shot. 616 00:26:32,761 --> 00:26:35,179 She got...pushed out a window. 617 00:26:35,179 --> 00:26:36,678 Did he tell you he did it? 618 00:26:38,262 --> 00:26:40,095 In so many words, yeah. 619 00:26:40,095 --> 00:26:42,012 Shit. Were you wearing a wire? 620 00:26:42,012 --> 00:26:43,803 Anyone else hear the conversation? 621 00:26:43,803 --> 00:26:46,179 No. Look, cops want us to come in and answer questions. 622 00:26:46,179 --> 00:26:48,053 Fuck! All right. Go get packed. 623 00:26:48,053 --> 00:26:49,845 George, call Benny. Tell him to get the van. 624 00:26:49,845 --> 00:26:51,179 We got to take some cargo to Canada. 625 00:26:51,179 --> 00:26:53,845 No. No. I'm not running. I need to protect him. 626 00:26:53,845 --> 00:26:55,803 What are my options here? 627 00:26:55,803 --> 00:26:57,429 Oh, you want options? 628 00:26:57,429 --> 00:26:59,053 He wants options. 629 00:26:59,053 --> 00:27:01,803 God damn it! 630 00:27:01,803 --> 00:27:03,095 You're a Milkovich. 631 00:27:03,095 --> 00:27:05,053 Cops gonna pin this on you so fast, 632 00:27:05,053 --> 00:27:06,345 you'll be back in the pen 633 00:27:06,345 --> 00:27:08,387 before lights out in cellblock C. 634 00:27:08,387 --> 00:27:10,137 Nothing else you can do but run. 635 00:27:10,137 --> 00:27:12,220 Oh, unless you got married. 636 00:27:12,220 --> 00:27:13,970 See, you can't testify against each other in court 637 00:27:13,970 --> 00:27:16,137 if you're mister and mister. 638 00:27:16,137 --> 00:27:19,095 Milkovich men marry vaginas, period. 639 00:27:19,095 --> 00:27:20,845 He's gay, Terry. 640 00:27:20,845 --> 00:27:23,304 I'm gay. People are gay. Do you want a beer? 641 00:27:23,304 --> 00:27:25,262 Shut your filthy mouth. 642 00:27:25,262 --> 00:27:27,678 Hey, marriage isn't about sexual orientation anyway. 643 00:27:27,678 --> 00:27:29,761 We like pussy, right, Snook? 644 00:27:29,761 --> 00:27:30,887 Fucking love pussy. 645 00:27:30,887 --> 00:27:32,511 Can't get enough pussy. 646 00:27:32,511 --> 00:27:33,845 We're both zero percent gay. 647 00:27:33,845 --> 00:27:35,095 Yeah, we're not even prison gay. 648 00:27:35,095 --> 00:27:36,636 But technically, 649 00:27:36,636 --> 00:27:38,345 we've been legally married for what, George? 650 00:27:38,345 --> 00:27:39,845 - Nine years? - Yeah. 651 00:27:39,845 --> 00:27:41,262 Thirteen federal court hearings. 652 00:27:41,262 --> 00:27:43,137 Never testified against each other once. 653 00:27:43,137 --> 00:27:44,678 H-hold on. So you're saying that 654 00:27:44,678 --> 00:27:46,220 if Ian and I get married, 655 00:27:46,220 --> 00:27:49,095 then anything that happens between us is a secret? 656 00:27:49,095 --> 00:27:50,636 You marry someone with a cock, 657 00:27:50,636 --> 00:27:53,179 I will bludgeon you dead in your sleep. 658 00:27:53,179 --> 00:27:56,095 Good talk, Dad. Thanks. 659 00:27:56,095 --> 00:27:58,636 Product conviction. That is what it is about. 660 00:27:58,636 --> 00:28:01,012 You have got to have conviction in your product. 661 00:28:01,012 --> 00:28:04,553 Equals sales, equals profit, equals new Mercedes. 662 00:28:04,553 --> 00:28:06,053 I don't sell Escargold. 663 00:28:06,053 --> 00:28:08,470 Escargold sells itself. 664 00:28:08,470 --> 00:28:11,553 I get to sit back and wax my 'Cedes with an Hermes scarf. 665 00:28:11,553 --> 00:28:12,845 Mm! 666 00:28:12,845 --> 00:28:14,053 Kev knows what I'm talking about. 667 00:28:14,053 --> 00:28:15,720 - Kev knows! 668 00:28:15,720 --> 00:28:17,053 Can you talk some more about the marketing tiers? 669 00:28:17,053 --> 00:28:18,179 What exactly is that? 670 00:28:18,179 --> 00:28:20,262 Multitier marketing. 671 00:28:20,262 --> 00:28:22,803 It's like-- You know what it's like, Kev? 672 00:28:22,803 --> 00:28:24,179 Sports. 673 00:28:24,179 --> 00:28:25,429 I'm the captain of my team, 674 00:28:25,429 --> 00:28:27,220 and I want you two to play for me 675 00:28:27,220 --> 00:28:28,262 because you're gonna be great players. 676 00:28:28,262 --> 00:28:30,887 MVPs. Top-draw producers. Okay? 677 00:28:30,887 --> 00:28:32,262 So I'm gonna take a little percentage 678 00:28:32,262 --> 00:28:34,220 of your sales off the top because I recruited you. 679 00:28:34,220 --> 00:28:35,220 - Mm-hmm. - But once you are up 680 00:28:35,220 --> 00:28:36,553 and running and you have 681 00:28:36,553 --> 00:28:38,095 quadrupled your initial investment-- 682 00:28:38,095 --> 00:28:39,678 Which takes how long? 683 00:28:39,678 --> 00:28:41,429 Six months if you've got hustle. 684 00:28:41,429 --> 00:28:43,137 You good with Insta? Snap? Twitter? 685 00:28:43,137 --> 00:28:44,470 So good. 686 00:28:44,470 --> 00:28:45,595 So what's your capital investment? 687 00:28:45,595 --> 00:28:47,511 Because for 2,500, 688 00:28:47,511 --> 00:28:49,803 we can get your inventory set up, and we can play ball. 689 00:28:49,803 --> 00:28:51,012 We have 825. 690 00:28:52,220 --> 00:28:54,345 For 825, 691 00:28:54,345 --> 00:28:57,179 we can get your inventory set up, and we can play ball. 692 00:28:57,179 --> 00:28:59,429 So why don't you two follow me out to my 'Cedes? 693 00:28:59,429 --> 00:29:01,137 And we are gonna load you up. 694 00:29:01,137 --> 00:29:02,345 I still don't know what the product is. 695 00:29:02,345 --> 00:29:04,095 - What is Escargold? - Yeah. What does it do? 696 00:29:07,262 --> 00:29:08,720 Now, I know what you're thinking 697 00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:10,511 "This is just some Korean skincare fad." 698 00:29:10,511 --> 00:29:12,262 And the answer is no. 699 00:29:12,262 --> 00:29:14,803 Escargold eyepatches minimize wrinkles 700 00:29:14,803 --> 00:29:16,429 and de-puff eyes. 701 00:29:16,429 --> 00:29:18,761 Using a special ingredient-- 702 00:29:18,761 --> 00:29:21,636 snail mucus. 703 00:29:21,636 --> 00:29:23,553 Snail? Like slugs? 704 00:29:23,553 --> 00:29:24,761 No. 705 00:29:24,761 --> 00:29:26,970 Snail like expensive. 706 00:29:26,970 --> 00:29:28,304 - Mm-hmm. - Very rare. 707 00:29:28,304 --> 00:29:29,845 They're really popular all over Europe 708 00:29:29,845 --> 00:29:30,887 and parts of France, guys. 709 00:29:30,887 --> 00:29:32,345 They really do work. 710 00:29:32,345 --> 00:29:35,636 Ingredients are all-natural and organic. 711 00:29:35,636 --> 00:29:37,304 Yeah, 'cause they're snails. 712 00:29:37,304 --> 00:29:39,678 Free samples coming around. 713 00:29:39,678 --> 00:29:42,137 Once you try it, you are sure to buy a case 714 00:29:42,137 --> 00:29:44,262 for our special introductory price 715 00:29:44,262 --> 00:29:47,970 of $29.99. 716 00:29:47,970 --> 00:29:49,304 V, what the hell are we supposed to do again? 717 00:29:49,304 --> 00:29:51,137 Make a face story on graham cracker? 718 00:29:51,137 --> 00:29:53,470 Why don't you let me handle the social media? 719 00:30:04,137 --> 00:30:06,553 Afternoon, sir. Name's Carl Gallagher. 720 00:30:06,553 --> 00:30:08,511 I'm here to join the police academy, 721 00:30:08,511 --> 00:30:10,845 dedicate my life to law enforcement, 722 00:30:10,845 --> 00:30:14,304 and here is my ID that says I'm 21. 723 00:30:14,304 --> 00:30:16,678 How old are you really, son? 724 00:30:16,678 --> 00:30:19,511 - How old do you need me to be? - The age you actually are. 725 00:30:19,511 --> 00:30:23,179 I'm 21. Just look at my ID. 726 00:30:23,179 --> 00:30:25,845 Well, this says your name is Lewis McGillicutty, Carl. 727 00:30:25,845 --> 00:30:29,262 Born 1947. 728 00:30:29,262 --> 00:30:30,887 But this just shows how much I want it. 729 00:30:30,887 --> 00:30:33,179 - Out. - Oh, come on. 730 00:30:33,179 --> 00:30:35,429 How many minors do you get in here begging to join the force? 731 00:30:35,429 --> 00:30:38,012 Begging to make shit money and get called a pig? 732 00:30:38,012 --> 00:30:39,511 This is my calling. 733 00:30:39,511 --> 00:30:41,012 Punishing the oppressors of the underclass 734 00:30:41,012 --> 00:30:42,345 is what I'm all about. 735 00:30:42,345 --> 00:30:44,220 I have three skills to offer you, sir 736 00:30:44,220 --> 00:30:46,345 I like to choke things, I'm good with weapons, 737 00:30:46,345 --> 00:30:48,095 and I got a buttload of rage in my heart. 738 00:30:48,095 --> 00:30:50,678 Hey, Cody. Come on out. 739 00:30:50,678 --> 00:30:52,179 What? 740 00:30:52,179 --> 00:30:53,720 Now, it's not exactly the academy, Carl, 741 00:30:53,720 --> 00:30:55,220 but it might be up your alley. 742 00:30:55,220 --> 00:30:57,720 Uh, this is Carl--I think he'd be a great candidate 743 00:30:57,720 --> 00:31:00,345 for the kids thing that we do. What are we calling it-- 744 00:31:00,345 --> 00:31:01,304 what the hell you talking about? 745 00:31:01,304 --> 00:31:03,053 The youth thing we do for-- 746 00:31:03,053 --> 00:31:05,053 uh, mentorship for the teenagers. 747 00:31:05,053 --> 00:31:06,304 Oh, we're still doing that bullshit? 748 00:31:06,304 --> 00:31:09,304 It's called the Youth Committee 749 00:31:09,304 --> 00:31:12,595 to Investigate Youthful Comm-- uh, something like that. 750 00:31:12,595 --> 00:31:14,304 Yeah, that's it. 751 00:31:14,304 --> 00:31:15,553 And it's for students who are interested 752 00:31:15,553 --> 00:31:16,928 in a career in law enforcement. 753 00:31:16,928 --> 00:31:19,053 I'm interested. What does it entail, sir? 754 00:31:19,053 --> 00:31:21,761 Eh, not much, just a couple hours after school every week. 755 00:31:21,761 --> 00:31:23,511 Um... 756 00:31:23,511 --> 00:31:25,887 there's usually a flash grenade demonstration at some point. 757 00:31:25,887 --> 00:31:28,137 Flash grenades? What about real grenades? 758 00:31:28,137 --> 00:31:30,553 Oh, he's gonna fit right in. 759 00:31:32,720 --> 00:31:34,470 In today's segment 760 00:31:34,470 --> 00:31:36,429 - of "Snowflake Central"... 761 00:31:36,429 --> 00:31:39,636 ...we focus on the latest victim of the liberal agenda-- 762 00:31:39,636 --> 00:31:41,636 an elementary-school gun show. 763 00:31:41,636 --> 00:31:43,429 Dallas resident Sandra Benson 764 00:31:43,429 --> 00:31:44,636 was looking forward to sharing... 765 00:31:44,636 --> 00:31:46,053 Hey. 766 00:31:46,053 --> 00:31:48,304 Hi, hi, hi, hi. 767 00:31:48,304 --> 00:31:49,429 ...a fourth grader who couldn't wait... 768 00:31:49,429 --> 00:31:51,887 Uh, hello? 769 00:31:51,887 --> 00:31:54,511 Oh, hello. Aunt Oopie here. 770 00:31:54,511 --> 00:31:56,095 - Hey. - Not gonna call you Lip. 771 00:31:56,095 --> 00:31:57,928 Hope that's okay. 772 00:31:57,928 --> 00:32:00,304 Gonna call you by your lovely God-given name, Phillip. 773 00:32:00,304 --> 00:32:01,345 Okay. 774 00:32:01,345 --> 00:32:02,887 - After the prophet. - Right. 775 00:32:02,887 --> 00:32:04,761 Oopie Tamietti at your service. 776 00:32:04,761 --> 00:32:06,304 Is that O-O-O-pie? 777 00:32:06,304 --> 00:32:09,053 No, it's Oopie. Like "loopy." 778 00:32:09,053 --> 00:32:10,095 Okay. 779 00:32:10,095 --> 00:32:11,304 Uh, well, thank you-- 780 00:32:11,304 --> 00:32:13,345 thanks for watching Fred for us, you know? 781 00:32:13,345 --> 00:32:15,720 Honestly, I'm just so happy to be able to spend time 782 00:32:15,720 --> 00:32:17,970 with that creamy little Alfredo sauce! 783 00:32:17,970 --> 00:32:19,137 - Yeah. - He's the best baby on Earth. 784 00:32:19,137 --> 00:32:20,511 He is. 785 00:32:20,511 --> 00:32:22,304 He is. Um, has he been resting long? 786 00:32:22,304 --> 00:32:24,928 - I'd say about 40 minutes. - Okay. 787 00:32:24,928 --> 00:32:27,220 Uh, so I did two loads of laundry, 788 00:32:27,220 --> 00:32:29,470 - caught up on my Hannity... - I saw that. 789 00:32:29,470 --> 00:32:31,304 ...roasted a chicken for supper, and made sweet rolls. 790 00:32:31,304 --> 00:32:32,887 Do you like sweet rolls, Phillip? 791 00:32:32,887 --> 00:32:35,304 Come on. Sit down. 792 00:32:35,304 --> 00:32:38,012 You've had a long day at work, I'm sure. 793 00:32:38,012 --> 00:32:40,137 Have a seat. 794 00:32:40,137 --> 00:32:43,636 So listen, I have to insist 795 00:32:43,636 --> 00:32:46,470 that Fred not go back to that filthy daycare center. 796 00:32:46,470 --> 00:32:48,012 Oh. 797 00:32:48,012 --> 00:32:51,970 Because why would he, when Aunt Oopie is free? 798 00:32:51,970 --> 00:32:54,470 Yeah, I just--Tami and I, we should really, uh, 799 00:32:54,470 --> 00:32:55,304 - maybe discuss-- - Here. Try this. 800 00:32:55,304 --> 00:32:56,636 You're gonna love it, Phillip. 801 00:32:56,636 --> 00:32:58,345 - Am I right? 802 00:32:58,345 --> 00:33:00,179 - Am I right or am I right? - Mmm. 803 00:33:00,179 --> 00:33:02,179 Yeah, you're--you're right. 804 00:33:04,720 --> 00:33:06,095 That's delicious. 805 00:33:09,345 --> 00:33:11,012 Here we are... 806 00:33:11,012 --> 00:33:12,553 the master bedroom. 807 00:33:12,553 --> 00:33:14,470 This is full of promise. 808 00:33:16,678 --> 00:33:18,678 Jesus H Christ in Heaven, my Lord, 809 00:33:18,678 --> 00:33:19,887 thank You for this gift 810 00:33:19,887 --> 00:33:21,179 - of daily stuff. 811 00:33:21,179 --> 00:33:23,595 He organized them by year and distillery. 812 00:33:25,511 --> 00:33:28,095 His lifelong passion. 813 00:33:28,095 --> 00:33:30,012 This one... 814 00:33:30,012 --> 00:33:33,345 - looks really old. 815 00:33:35,012 --> 00:33:37,095 This is the scary room? 816 00:33:38,595 --> 00:33:41,511 There's nothing in here. A bed and some air. 817 00:33:41,511 --> 00:33:43,845 That's 'cause you're not on the bed. 818 00:33:43,845 --> 00:33:46,137 - That's where they torment. - Uh... 819 00:33:46,137 --> 00:33:47,470 Cheers, to us. 820 00:33:50,387 --> 00:33:51,345 This bed? 821 00:33:56,095 --> 00:33:57,553 Nothing here. 822 00:33:57,553 --> 00:33:59,429 I'll take another one, doll. 823 00:33:59,429 --> 00:34:01,553 That's 'cause you have to lie on the bed. 824 00:34:01,553 --> 00:34:03,053 - Ah. - Close your eyes. 825 00:34:03,053 --> 00:34:04,387 You'll see. 826 00:34:05,928 --> 00:34:07,511 Mm. 827 00:34:07,511 --> 00:34:08,636 Eh? 828 00:34:12,220 --> 00:34:15,511 - Now lay very still. - Okay. 829 00:34:15,511 --> 00:34:17,553 - Don't move a muscle. 830 00:34:17,553 --> 00:34:20,137 Eyes shut tight. 831 00:34:20,137 --> 00:34:21,803 And listen. 832 00:34:25,095 --> 00:34:27,845 - You hear that? - Mm-hmm. 833 00:34:27,845 --> 00:34:30,678 I think you may have scared the spirits away. 834 00:34:32,761 --> 00:34:35,761 Do you like to play, Frank? 835 00:34:38,053 --> 00:34:39,179 Mm-hmm. 836 00:34:39,179 --> 00:34:40,179 Then let's play. 837 00:34:42,179 --> 00:34:42,970 Open your eyes. 838 00:34:45,803 --> 00:34:47,429 What? 839 00:34:47,429 --> 00:34:48,429 Boo! 840 00:34:55,220 --> 00:34:58,845 Whoo! 841 00:35:14,012 --> 00:35:17,304 Todd! Todd! Todd! Todd! 842 00:35:17,304 --> 00:35:19,803 - You're Todd's manager, right? - Guilty. 843 00:35:19,803 --> 00:35:21,803 His kneeling photo is blowing up. 844 00:35:21,803 --> 00:35:23,887 120,000 likes already. 845 00:35:23,887 --> 00:35:25,970 And Jay-Z commented, "We're past this." 846 00:35:25,970 --> 00:35:28,137 Your guy is famous. 847 00:35:28,137 --> 00:35:29,636 Well, it's easy to represent 848 00:35:29,636 --> 00:35:32,053 someone who takes such a strong stand. 849 00:35:35,678 --> 00:35:37,220 What are you doing after the game? 850 00:35:37,220 --> 00:35:38,095 Excuse me, ladies. 851 00:35:38,095 --> 00:35:40,137 Business calls. 852 00:35:40,137 --> 00:35:41,803 Dude, you're trending. 853 00:35:41,803 --> 00:35:44,262 Time to decide what you took a knee for. 854 00:35:44,262 --> 00:35:45,678 - Huh? - Lots of options. 855 00:35:45,678 --> 00:35:48,345 Race, Trump, being poor, 856 00:35:48,345 --> 00:35:50,470 bad food in schools, kids with leukemia. 857 00:35:50,470 --> 00:35:51,970 Got to pick. 858 00:35:51,970 --> 00:35:53,387 I was just fixing my shoes. 859 00:35:53,387 --> 00:35:55,928 You want sponsorships or not? 860 00:35:55,928 --> 00:35:58,053 Thanks. 861 00:35:58,053 --> 00:35:59,511 Thanks for meeting up with me. 862 00:35:59,511 --> 00:36:01,928 No problem. Let me just take my Plan B. 863 00:36:01,928 --> 00:36:03,511 Totally screwed the pooch last night. 864 00:36:06,470 --> 00:36:08,012 A guy I boned was legit poor. 865 00:36:08,012 --> 00:36:09,803 Like, works at goddamn Macy's 866 00:36:09,803 --> 00:36:12,304 and is not even associate manager. 867 00:36:12,304 --> 00:36:14,053 His tie had a snipped-in-half label on the back. 868 00:36:14,053 --> 00:36:16,345 Fuck my life. 869 00:36:16,345 --> 00:36:18,720 How about you? How'd you make out? 870 00:36:18,720 --> 00:36:22,595 Yeah. So that's what I wanted to talk to you about. 871 00:36:22,595 --> 00:36:24,511 I think I might be a prostitute. 872 00:36:24,511 --> 00:36:26,137 Yas, queen! 873 00:36:26,137 --> 00:36:28,803 So I didn't go off with that old rich guy last night. 874 00:36:28,803 --> 00:36:31,720 I met someone else. Her name is Claudia. 875 00:36:31,720 --> 00:36:33,387 We went up to her room and hooked up, 876 00:36:33,387 --> 00:36:36,720 and now she's buying me dresses and giving me cash 877 00:36:36,720 --> 00:36:38,887 and gonna take me to a nice dinner. 878 00:36:38,887 --> 00:36:40,345 I'm really conflicted. 879 00:36:40,345 --> 00:36:42,761 You hit the jackpot. 880 00:36:42,761 --> 00:36:43,887 Or... 881 00:36:43,887 --> 00:36:45,304 the mother lode. 882 00:36:45,304 --> 00:36:46,970 Get it? 883 00:36:46,970 --> 00:36:48,429 You don't think it's a little slutty? 884 00:36:48,429 --> 00:36:50,678 Having a sugar mama? Fuck, no. 885 00:36:50,678 --> 00:36:52,803 It is a true unicorn. 886 00:36:52,803 --> 00:36:55,220 You got no dusty dicks. No dangling balls. 887 00:36:55,220 --> 00:36:57,179 You get actual orgasms all night. 888 00:36:57,179 --> 00:36:58,803 You ride her 889 00:36:58,803 --> 00:37:00,678 all the way to a college fund for Franny, girl. 890 00:37:04,761 --> 00:37:06,845 I look like a rabid raccoon. 891 00:37:06,845 --> 00:37:09,429 My eyes! 892 00:37:09,429 --> 00:37:11,678 The pain comes in waves! 893 00:37:11,678 --> 00:37:13,928 Your snail piss burned our skin off! 894 00:37:15,095 --> 00:37:15,970 Fuck! 895 00:37:15,970 --> 00:37:17,803 This sucks! 896 00:37:17,803 --> 00:37:19,511 We hear your concerns. 897 00:37:19,511 --> 00:37:21,720 Obviously, we have the same concerns 898 00:37:21,720 --> 00:37:23,595 about our product as you do. 899 00:37:25,511 --> 00:37:27,595 Aloe gel coming around. 900 00:37:27,595 --> 00:37:30,928 Put it on the burned area with our deep apologies. 901 00:37:30,928 --> 00:37:32,970 You need to call that bitch back again. 902 00:37:32,970 --> 00:37:34,761 We got to return this shit and get our money back. 903 00:37:34,761 --> 00:37:36,179 I have called her 20 times. 904 00:37:36,179 --> 00:37:37,845 She keeps sending us to voice mail. 905 00:37:37,845 --> 00:37:40,095 Give me the phone--I know how to get her coward ass here. 906 00:37:42,012 --> 00:37:44,345 "Girl, we need more product. Sold out inventory." 907 00:37:44,345 --> 00:37:46,053 Smiley face emoji. 908 00:37:49,511 --> 00:37:51,761 She's coming right over. 909 00:37:54,095 --> 00:37:56,595 Uh, you know, we usually just kind of all grab something 910 00:37:56,595 --> 00:37:58,678 and eat clustered around the sink. 911 00:37:58,678 --> 00:38:00,928 Well, that's a bunch of crazy. 912 00:38:00,928 --> 00:38:03,845 You want to keep this great country of ours great, 913 00:38:03,845 --> 00:38:06,179 it starts at the home, 914 00:38:06,179 --> 00:38:07,761 with prayers to our Lord Jesus 915 00:38:07,761 --> 00:38:09,678 - and three square meals a day. 916 00:38:11,345 --> 00:38:13,803 - Hello! - Hey! 917 00:38:13,803 --> 00:38:15,470 - Hi. Oopie! 918 00:38:15,470 --> 00:38:18,053 Little Tami! Oh, my goodness. 919 00:38:18,053 --> 00:38:20,720 I love this baby so much. 920 00:38:20,720 --> 00:38:22,179 And this man of yours-- 921 00:38:22,179 --> 00:38:23,970 a fixer-upper, for sure... 922 00:38:23,970 --> 00:38:26,803 ...but that house has good bones. 923 00:38:26,803 --> 00:38:28,304 Well, thank you so much for coming 924 00:38:28,304 --> 00:38:29,595 on such short notice, Aunt Oopie. 925 00:38:29,595 --> 00:38:32,304 Of course, honeybun. Now, let's see. 926 00:38:32,304 --> 00:38:34,678 Fred has probably got another hour or so 927 00:38:34,678 --> 00:38:36,720 before I wake him up for supper. 928 00:38:36,720 --> 00:38:38,845 - Okay. - I can do bath time. 929 00:38:38,845 --> 00:38:42,511 So why don't you two go have a date? 930 00:38:42,511 --> 00:38:43,845 Aunt Oopie's got everything covered here. 931 00:38:43,845 --> 00:38:45,761 - Date? - A date? 932 00:38:45,761 --> 00:38:48,220 Yeah. Or a nap or just an adult conversation. 933 00:38:48,220 --> 00:38:50,095 Go on, now. 934 00:38:50,095 --> 00:38:52,137 I'm gonna teach Fred and that little colored boy 935 00:38:52,137 --> 00:38:54,761 about the Gettysburg Address after supper. 936 00:38:54,761 --> 00:38:56,595 I'm sorry. Wha-what was that part? 937 00:38:56,595 --> 00:38:57,636 - A date. - She just-- 938 00:38:57,636 --> 00:38:59,095 - A date. - No, I heard-- 939 00:38:59,095 --> 00:39:00,429 That's great. Thanks, Aunt Oopie. 940 00:39:00,429 --> 00:39:02,095 Go on, now. Enjoy yourselves. 941 00:39:02,095 --> 00:39:03,179 - No, see, the other part-- - It's good to go out 942 00:39:03,179 --> 00:39:04,429 and participate in the economy 943 00:39:04,429 --> 00:39:05,678 so we don't have to give handouts 944 00:39:05,678 --> 00:39:07,345 to those welfare cheats and... 945 00:39:07,345 --> 00:39:08,928 - Okay! - ...illegal immigrants. 946 00:39:08,928 --> 00:39:10,262 - Yeah. I just-- - All right. Bye. 947 00:39:10,262 --> 00:39:11,720 Please. Come on. 948 00:39:11,720 --> 00:39:13,845 - Have fun. 949 00:39:23,053 --> 00:39:24,220 Hey. 950 00:39:24,220 --> 00:39:26,470 - Hey. 951 00:39:26,470 --> 00:39:27,304 Thanks for meeting me. 952 00:39:29,345 --> 00:39:30,470 Yeah. Sure thing, Formal. 953 00:39:31,720 --> 00:39:33,220 Let's order. I'm fucking starving. 954 00:39:35,887 --> 00:39:38,636 You, uh, get your new PO assignment? 955 00:39:38,636 --> 00:39:40,095 I'm back with Larry fucking Seaver-- 956 00:39:40,095 --> 00:39:41,387 I think we should get married. 957 00:39:43,345 --> 00:39:44,553 What? 958 00:39:44,553 --> 00:39:46,803 We should get married. 959 00:39:46,803 --> 00:39:49,470 Then we can't testify against each other... 960 00:39:49,470 --> 00:39:51,720 in a court of law. 961 00:39:51,720 --> 00:39:54,678 You know, in case one of us, uh... 962 00:39:54,678 --> 00:39:56,928 had something on the other. 963 00:39:58,720 --> 00:40:00,678 It's called spousal privilege. 964 00:40:00,678 --> 00:40:03,429 Yeah. Yeah. I, uh, heard of it. 965 00:40:03,429 --> 00:40:04,636 It's for both of our protection, you know? 966 00:40:04,636 --> 00:40:07,304 Just help us keep things clean, 967 00:40:07,304 --> 00:40:09,345 help us toe the line a little bit. 968 00:40:09,345 --> 00:40:11,262 So what are you thinking? 969 00:40:11,262 --> 00:40:13,678 I think staying out of jail's a crap reason to get married. 970 00:40:13,678 --> 00:40:14,970 No. We fucking love each other. 971 00:40:14,970 --> 00:40:17,429 That's why we're gonna get married. 972 00:40:17,429 --> 00:40:20,511 The legal stuff, it's just...bonus. 973 00:40:20,511 --> 00:40:22,429 I mean, this is marriage, though, man. 974 00:40:22,429 --> 00:40:25,845 It's kind of a...big step, don't you think? 975 00:40:27,345 --> 00:40:28,720 I love you. 976 00:40:30,262 --> 00:40:32,595 And... 977 00:40:32,595 --> 00:40:34,345 and I trust you. 978 00:40:39,095 --> 00:40:41,803 Do you love and trust me, too? 979 00:40:45,220 --> 00:40:47,803 Jesus Christ. 980 00:40:47,803 --> 00:40:49,470 Okay. 981 00:40:49,470 --> 00:40:51,720 So maybe this decision isn't that hard. 982 00:40:51,720 --> 00:40:53,262 Jesus Christ. 983 00:40:53,262 --> 00:40:55,636 You proposing to me over fucking patty melts? 984 00:40:55,636 --> 00:40:58,137 Yeah. I guess I am. 985 00:40:59,761 --> 00:41:01,429 So what do you say? You want to fit it in? 986 00:41:02,803 --> 00:41:05,137 Fuck it. I do. 987 00:41:10,928 --> 00:41:13,553 There he is. The slayer! 988 00:41:13,553 --> 00:41:14,887 - Way to slay. 989 00:41:14,887 --> 00:41:17,053 I got you six more cases, you killer. 990 00:41:17,053 --> 00:41:19,845 Well, psych! 'Cause we don't want any more. 991 00:41:19,845 --> 00:41:21,095 You burned our customers' faces off. 992 00:41:21,095 --> 00:41:23,262 Look at 'em. Like a bunch of linebackers. 993 00:41:23,262 --> 00:41:25,012 We want a full refund, and we want it now. 994 00:41:28,137 --> 00:41:29,928 You know, as I always tell my teammates, 995 00:41:29,928 --> 00:41:32,095 a life in sales means good days and bad. 996 00:41:32,095 --> 00:41:34,095 Sometimes your products 997 00:41:34,095 --> 00:41:34,720 are just gonna fly off the shelves, and other times-- 998 00:41:34,720 --> 00:41:36,470 Oh, cut the shit, Tessa. 999 00:41:36,470 --> 00:41:38,845 Our eyes feel like liquid molten lava. 1000 00:41:38,845 --> 00:41:41,470 Eight hundred and twenty-five dollars, now. 1001 00:41:42,304 --> 00:41:43,845 Look, I really want to give you guys your money back, 1002 00:41:43,845 --> 00:41:45,678 but the thing is, 1003 00:41:45,678 --> 00:41:47,304 my hands are tied. 1004 00:41:47,304 --> 00:41:48,928 There are absolutely no refunds of Escargold. 1005 00:41:48,928 --> 00:41:51,262 It is a firm company policy. 1006 00:41:51,262 --> 00:41:53,845 And you two did... 1007 00:41:53,845 --> 00:41:55,511 e-sign the agreement. 1008 00:41:57,262 --> 00:42:00,220 What the fuck are we gonna do with nine cases of slug burn? 1009 00:42:00,220 --> 00:42:02,803 I don't know. Be inventive. 1010 00:42:05,845 --> 00:42:07,887 Here we go. 1011 00:42:07,887 --> 00:42:10,387 These are the Youths Discovering Leadership Laws 1012 00:42:10,387 --> 00:42:12,761 or whatever. 1013 00:42:12,761 --> 00:42:16,053 Youths! This is Carl. 1014 00:42:16,053 --> 00:42:17,553 Whoa. 1015 00:42:17,553 --> 00:42:19,053 What the shit is this? 1016 00:42:19,053 --> 00:42:21,220 Our youth leader program. 1017 00:42:21,220 --> 00:42:23,387 Uh, that's Wilder, 1018 00:42:23,387 --> 00:42:24,636 Hemingway, 1019 00:42:24,636 --> 00:42:26,012 Penelope, Hunter-- 1020 00:42:26,012 --> 00:42:28,220 - Stop. 1021 00:42:28,220 --> 00:42:29,636 These are our future police? 1022 00:42:29,636 --> 00:42:31,928 Mm, doubt it. 1023 00:42:31,928 --> 00:42:34,262 Uh, most do it for their college applications. 1024 00:42:34,262 --> 00:42:37,928 They put it next to ski club, yearbook committee.. 1025 00:42:37,928 --> 00:42:39,803 - Oh, no, no, no. - ...Habitat for Humanity-- 1026 00:42:39,803 --> 00:42:41,595 Who's in charge here? 1027 00:42:41,595 --> 00:42:44,137 Well, we had a lieutenant running things for a while, 1028 00:42:44,137 --> 00:42:46,345 but he's out recovering from a heart attack. 1029 00:42:46,345 --> 00:42:49,429 So, for now, they're kind of on their own. 1030 00:42:53,179 --> 00:42:55,053 Just give me 24 hours with them, sir. 1031 00:42:55,053 --> 00:42:57,179 I'll whip 'em into shape. 1032 00:43:18,304 --> 00:43:20,678 Hey, uh, I don't think we're supposed to... 1033 00:43:20,678 --> 00:43:23,012 Hold up. I got a link from Larry. 1034 00:43:23,012 --> 00:43:24,636 In what now appears 1035 00:43:24,636 --> 00:43:26,678 to have been a lover's quarrel, 1036 00:43:26,678 --> 00:43:28,304 Michelle "Shelly" Demeter has been arrested and charged 1037 00:43:28,304 --> 00:43:29,720 for the aggravated murder of Paula Bitterman. 1038 00:43:29,720 --> 00:43:31,928 What the fuck? 1039 00:43:31,928 --> 00:43:33,387 An eyewitness account has confirmed that Demeter... 1040 00:43:33,387 --> 00:43:35,220 Wait. Is that the lady from the ambulance company? 1041 00:43:35,220 --> 00:43:37,595 Bitterman was just 47 years old. 1042 00:43:37,595 --> 00:43:39,179 You didn't kill Paula. 1043 00:43:39,179 --> 00:43:40,720 I told you I didn't. I thought you killed Paula. 1044 00:43:40,720 --> 00:43:42,220 Told you I didn't. 1045 00:43:42,220 --> 00:43:43,928 But you kept talking about how you wanted her dead. 1046 00:43:43,928 --> 00:43:45,345 You said you wanted her dead, too, 1047 00:43:45,345 --> 00:43:47,137 and then you were with your fucking dad all night. 1048 00:43:47,137 --> 00:43:48,761 Doesn't mean I just went and murdered somebody. 1049 00:43:48,761 --> 00:43:50,220 I just got out of prison. 1050 00:43:50,220 --> 00:43:52,012 I just got out of prison, too. 1051 00:43:52,012 --> 00:43:56,595 Mr. Gallagher and Mr. Milkovich? 1052 00:44:01,678 --> 00:44:03,137 Mr. Gallagher and Mr. Milkovich. 1053 00:44:03,137 --> 00:44:05,761 - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah. 1054 00:44:10,803 --> 00:44:15,179 Okay, everybody, time to think outside the snail box. 1055 00:44:15,179 --> 00:44:17,012 What could we use these guys for? 1056 00:44:17,012 --> 00:44:19,095 What secret use do they have? 1057 00:44:19,095 --> 00:44:20,553 Garbage can liner. 1058 00:44:23,179 --> 00:44:28,429 For a 10% cut of our total sales, 1059 00:44:28,429 --> 00:44:31,220 what else could these little gold bitches be used for? 1060 00:44:31,220 --> 00:44:33,511 All right? Best idea wins. 1061 00:44:33,511 --> 00:44:35,803 Come on, guys. Be creative. 1062 00:44:35,803 --> 00:44:37,678 They're small and sparkly. 1063 00:44:37,678 --> 00:44:40,137 They reduce puffiness and cause burning. 1064 00:44:40,137 --> 00:44:42,012 Mm, might work for herpes. 1065 00:44:42,012 --> 00:44:43,761 I hear herpes. Do I have a counter? 1066 00:44:43,761 --> 00:44:45,553 Well, if you put 16 of them on your chest, 1067 00:44:45,553 --> 00:44:46,887 it'll help you quit smoking. 1068 00:44:46,887 --> 00:44:48,887 - Okay, good. - Glue stick. 1069 00:44:48,887 --> 00:44:50,429 - Paint thinner. - Just smoke the shit. 1070 00:44:50,429 --> 00:44:52,387 Cure for snoring, 'cause your nose is burned off. 1071 00:44:52,387 --> 00:44:54,012 I like it, yeah. What else? 1072 00:44:54,012 --> 00:44:55,470 What's the main ingredient in 'em? 1073 00:44:55,470 --> 00:44:58,387 Uh, Korean, Korean, Korean, and caffeine. 1074 00:44:58,387 --> 00:45:00,220 Caffeine? 1075 00:45:00,220 --> 00:45:02,595 That's the main ingredient in Preparation H. 1076 00:45:02,595 --> 00:45:05,636 Not that I know anything about hemorrhoids, 1077 00:45:05,636 --> 00:45:07,803 because I do not. 1078 00:45:12,053 --> 00:45:13,803 I can't believe you thought I did it! 1079 00:45:13,803 --> 00:45:15,262 I can't believe you thought I did it. 1080 00:45:15,262 --> 00:45:16,970 I'm not the one fucking prone to murder here. 1081 00:45:16,970 --> 00:45:18,220 "Prone to m--" 1082 00:45:18,220 --> 00:45:21,304 Name me one person I've murdered! 1083 00:45:22,803 --> 00:45:24,595 Is this the only reason you proposed to me? 1084 00:45:24,595 --> 00:45:25,887 - No. - It is. 1085 00:45:25,887 --> 00:45:27,345 'Cause you thought I was fucking guilty. 1086 00:45:27,345 --> 00:45:29,012 There's plenty of fucking reasons. 1087 00:45:29,012 --> 00:45:30,636 But, yeah, I'd say it came up today 1088 00:45:30,636 --> 00:45:32,429 'cause not testifying against you is 1089 00:45:32,429 --> 00:45:34,761 a pretty big plus, Mickey. 1090 00:45:34,761 --> 00:45:38,095 So, uh, Misters Gallagher and Milkovich, 1091 00:45:38,095 --> 00:45:42,095 um, shall I proceed with the marriage license application? 1092 00:45:42,095 --> 00:45:44,429 Yeah, please, proceed. 1093 00:45:44,429 --> 00:45:45,928 Okay, great. 1094 00:45:45,928 --> 00:45:48,095 So, Mr. Milkovich, if you could just sign 1095 00:45:48,095 --> 00:45:49,887 right on that line there. 1096 00:45:52,053 --> 00:45:54,345 And now, Mr. Gallagher. 1097 00:45:57,304 --> 00:45:59,304 - Just sign... - Yep. 1098 00:45:59,304 --> 00:46:00,803 Yep, right on that line right there. 1099 00:46:00,803 --> 00:46:02,429 That's good. 1100 00:46:03,887 --> 00:46:05,553 Mr. Gallagher? 1101 00:46:10,928 --> 00:46:12,803 - You're fucking kidding. - Can we just talk for-- 1102 00:46:12,803 --> 00:46:14,429 Fuck. 1103 00:46:14,429 --> 00:46:16,636 Hey, can we have our paperwork back, please? 1104 00:46:16,636 --> 00:46:18,262 Sorry, sorry to waste your time. 1105 00:46:18,262 --> 00:46:20,511 Hey, Mickey! 1106 00:46:29,845 --> 00:46:32,095 Hey. 1107 00:46:32,095 --> 00:46:35,345 Hey. Oh, did the silk dress not fit? 1108 00:46:35,345 --> 00:46:36,761 Uh... 1109 00:46:36,761 --> 00:46:39,970 Look, Claudia, I really like free gifts and free money-- 1110 00:46:39,970 --> 00:46:42,761 Oh, good, because I have one more thing 1111 00:46:42,761 --> 00:46:44,012 I'd like you to have. 1112 00:46:44,012 --> 00:46:45,678 What's this? 1113 00:46:45,678 --> 00:46:49,012 Just open it. 1114 00:46:49,012 --> 00:46:50,553 It's a luggage tag. 1115 00:46:50,553 --> 00:46:52,262 You put your name and address on there, 1116 00:46:52,262 --> 00:46:53,179 and then you attach it to your luggage, 1117 00:46:53,179 --> 00:46:55,761 which you should pack, because... 1118 00:46:58,179 --> 00:47:01,595 We're going on a girls' trip to Kennebunkport. 1119 00:47:01,595 --> 00:47:03,179 Beach weekend. 1120 00:47:03,179 --> 00:47:07,720 I don't even own a suitcase. 1121 00:47:07,720 --> 00:47:11,429 But even if I did, it's hard for me to accept this from you. 1122 00:47:11,429 --> 00:47:13,429 It's all making me feel like a prostitute. 1123 00:47:13,429 --> 00:47:16,095 Oh, God, uh, come here. Sit down. 1124 00:47:16,095 --> 00:47:19,179 I am--I am so, so sorry. 1125 00:47:19,179 --> 00:47:22,179 Uh, that was not my intention at all. 1126 00:47:22,179 --> 00:47:24,470 I-I mean, yes, I did think you were a prostitute 1127 00:47:24,470 --> 00:47:26,012 when I picked you up on Ho Corner, 1128 00:47:26,012 --> 00:47:29,928 but I see now that you are much more than that. 1129 00:47:29,928 --> 00:47:31,887 Uh... 1130 00:47:31,887 --> 00:47:34,387 You make me feel 1131 00:47:34,387 --> 00:47:37,845 all flustered and tongue-tied and-- 1132 00:47:37,845 --> 00:47:42,761 I am sorry about the gifts. 1133 00:47:42,761 --> 00:47:46,220 The truth is, it's the only way I know how to show affection. 1134 00:47:46,220 --> 00:47:48,470 I am working on it with my therapist 1135 00:47:48,470 --> 00:47:50,262 because my father was a withholding narcissist, 1136 00:47:50,262 --> 00:47:53,220 but, truly, I am sorry. 1137 00:47:55,053 --> 00:47:56,761 No. 1138 00:47:56,761 --> 00:47:59,012 Hey, I-I'm sorry, too. 1139 00:47:59,012 --> 00:48:01,470 I can see you were just trying to be nice. 1140 00:48:01,470 --> 00:48:03,678 And trust me, I'm fucked up, too. 1141 00:48:03,678 --> 00:48:06,387 I see your withholding narcissist parent 1142 00:48:06,387 --> 00:48:09,053 and raise you a set of drug-addicted alcoholics. 1143 00:48:10,387 --> 00:48:14,304 Let's have a true do-over. 1144 00:48:14,304 --> 00:48:16,179 We could even go dutch on dinner. 1145 00:48:16,179 --> 00:48:19,429 Does dutch mean that you'll pay? 1146 00:48:19,429 --> 00:48:21,429 'Cause I doubt I could afford anything at this restaurant. 1147 00:48:31,429 --> 00:48:33,595 Do you remember Kyle Holmes, Frank? 1148 00:48:33,595 --> 00:48:34,970 What? Where am I? 1149 00:48:34,970 --> 00:48:36,928 Why does my head hurt? 1150 00:48:36,928 --> 00:48:38,179 I drugged your scotch. 1151 00:48:38,179 --> 00:48:40,304 That's Holmes, Frank. 1152 00:48:40,304 --> 00:48:43,387 H-O-L-M-E-S. 1153 00:48:43,387 --> 00:48:45,095 What? 1154 00:48:45,095 --> 00:48:48,262 Do you remember Kyle Holmes, Frank? 1155 00:48:48,262 --> 00:48:51,179 Why am I handcuffed? What the hell is this? 1156 00:48:51,179 --> 00:48:54,220 Kyle Holmes was my fiancé... 1157 00:48:54,220 --> 00:48:56,053 when my life was full of promise. 1158 00:48:56,053 --> 00:48:57,803 We were gonna get married... 1159 00:48:57,803 --> 00:49:00,179 until you ruined it. 1160 00:49:00,179 --> 00:49:03,553 Who are you? Who is this Kyle guy? 1161 00:49:03,553 --> 00:49:04,595 You know what you did! 1162 00:49:04,595 --> 00:49:06,636 I don't! I swear. 1163 00:49:14,179 --> 00:49:16,636 Summer of 1995. 1164 00:49:18,761 --> 00:49:22,012 It doesn't ring a bell? 1165 00:49:22,012 --> 00:49:25,636 Let's see if we can jog your memory. 1166 00:49:27,845 --> 00:49:31,137 It is an epidemic that we are facing in this country. 1167 00:49:31,137 --> 00:49:33,387 Street drugs, like crack, 1168 00:49:33,387 --> 00:49:38,179 ensnaring young American boys like you, 1169 00:49:38,179 --> 00:49:40,803 from good American families. 1170 00:49:40,803 --> 00:49:44,095 That is why there is a war on drugs in this country. 1171 00:49:44,095 --> 00:49:45,095 Is that him? 1172 00:49:45,095 --> 00:49:46,553 That's you, asshole. 1173 00:49:46,553 --> 00:49:48,845 Instead of punishing this poor man, 1174 00:49:48,845 --> 00:49:51,012 the victim, who was seduced 1175 00:49:51,012 --> 00:49:53,887 into using illegal street drugs, 1176 00:49:53,887 --> 00:49:56,928 we're gonna punish the hoodlums, the miscreants 1177 00:49:56,928 --> 00:50:01,095 for perpetuating this dark epidemic. 1178 00:50:01,095 --> 00:50:03,429 Frank Gallagher, 1179 00:50:03,429 --> 00:50:07,387 this court reduces your charge to a misdemeanor, 1180 00:50:07,387 --> 00:50:10,511 and you are sentenced to 30 days in rehab. 1181 00:50:10,511 --> 00:50:12,553 Thank you, Your Honor. 1182 00:50:12,553 --> 00:50:15,304 You have a good day now. 1183 00:50:15,304 --> 00:50:18,262 As for you, the deviant thug 1184 00:50:18,262 --> 00:50:20,595 that tried to rob and steal 1185 00:50:20,595 --> 00:50:22,761 this bright young man's future, 1186 00:50:22,761 --> 00:50:26,012 you are hereby sentenced to 45 years 1187 00:50:26,012 --> 00:50:28,179 for drug possession of crack cocaine. 1188 00:50:29,928 --> 00:50:31,761 Society's gonna be a lot safer 1189 00:50:31,761 --> 00:50:34,220 without you super predators out on the streets. 1190 00:50:38,262 --> 00:50:40,887 Twenty-four years he's been rotting in prison, 1191 00:50:40,887 --> 00:50:44,095 his entire adult life behind bars. 1192 00:50:44,095 --> 00:50:46,761 I-I-I mean, that's very unfortunate. 1193 00:50:46,761 --> 00:50:48,928 The '90s were a racist time. 1194 00:50:48,928 --> 00:50:51,345 But this feels like a "not me" problem. 1195 00:50:51,345 --> 00:50:54,720 This feels like a "not you" problem? 1196 00:50:58,761 --> 00:51:01,720 - You really don't remember. - I don't remember! 1197 00:51:01,720 --> 00:51:04,429 Look, admittedly, I was on crack at the time. 1198 00:51:04,429 --> 00:51:06,803 - Ouch. 1199 00:51:06,803 --> 00:51:09,595 I'm going to the hardware store for supplies. 1200 00:51:09,595 --> 00:51:12,845 Why don't you watch the video a few dozen more times? 1201 00:51:12,845 --> 00:51:15,053 - It's on a loop. - It is an epidemic... 1202 00:51:15,053 --> 00:51:17,095 What kind of supplies? 1203 00:51:17,095 --> 00:51:19,179 The kind that might make you remember. 1204 00:51:19,179 --> 00:51:21,928 Wait, no, can't we-- 1205 00:51:21,928 --> 00:51:24,553 ...ensnaring young American boys like you. 1206 00:51:24,553 --> 00:51:26,387 All right, flashlights. 1207 00:51:26,387 --> 00:51:28,345 - Check. - Walkie-talkies. 1208 00:51:28,345 --> 00:51:29,511 Check. 1209 00:51:29,511 --> 00:51:31,470 - Tire irons! - Check. 1210 00:51:31,470 --> 00:51:33,387 - Tasers. - Check. 1211 00:51:33,387 --> 00:51:35,636 - Chains. - Check. 1212 00:51:35,636 --> 00:51:37,761 Do we have to keep saying "check" every time? 1213 00:51:37,761 --> 00:51:40,304 Because my throat's getting dry-- 1214 00:51:40,304 --> 00:51:42,387 Sorry, sir. 1215 00:51:42,387 --> 00:51:44,179 - Gloves. - Check. 1216 00:51:44,179 --> 00:51:45,720 - Roll of coins. - Check. 1217 00:51:45,720 --> 00:51:47,387 - Map of the South Side. - Check. 1218 00:51:47,387 --> 00:51:49,803 All right, let's review. 1219 00:51:49,803 --> 00:51:52,595 You, you're gonna take half the platoon due west. 1220 00:51:52,595 --> 00:51:54,220 Your mission-- police this neighborhood 1221 00:51:54,220 --> 00:51:56,137 between point A and B. 1222 00:51:56,137 --> 00:51:58,553 I will take the other half due east. 1223 00:51:58,553 --> 00:52:01,179 We meet back at Camp Carl at 0600. 1224 00:52:01,179 --> 00:52:04,137 If someone fucks with you, you fuck back! 1225 00:52:04,137 --> 00:52:05,636 You will not sleep, 1226 00:52:05,636 --> 00:52:08,220 you will not eat until your zones are secure. 1227 00:52:08,220 --> 00:52:09,595 Am I clear? 1228 00:52:09,595 --> 00:52:11,304 - Yes, Carl! - Good. 1229 00:52:11,304 --> 00:52:13,887 Head on swivel. Radios on. 1230 00:52:13,887 --> 00:52:15,845 On my command, move out. 1231 00:52:15,845 --> 00:52:19,387 Go, go, go, go! 1232 00:52:19,387 --> 00:52:21,928 Hi, there. I'm Kevin at the Alibi. 1233 00:52:21,928 --> 00:52:24,511 Hi. I'm Veronica at the Alibi. 1234 00:52:24,511 --> 00:52:26,845 And we struggle with hemorrhoids. 1235 00:52:26,845 --> 00:52:28,928 Shh, Kev, that's embarrassing. 1236 00:52:28,928 --> 00:52:31,511 Why, there's nothing to be embarrassed about, V, 1237 00:52:31,511 --> 00:52:33,553 not when there's such an affordable and easy way 1238 00:52:33,553 --> 00:52:36,678 to cure hemorrhoids, for a very low introductory price 1239 00:52:36,678 --> 00:52:39,095 at the Alibi on the South Side. 1240 00:52:39,095 --> 00:52:42,220 That's right, Escargold Butt Patches. 1241 00:52:42,220 --> 00:52:44,304 Safe and easy to use. 1242 00:52:44,304 --> 00:52:47,012 You just rip open the package 1243 00:52:47,012 --> 00:52:49,803 and put 'em on your butt crack. 1244 00:52:53,429 --> 00:52:57,137 Wow, that is so easy. But does it work, Kev? 1245 00:52:57,137 --> 00:52:58,970 Why, yes, Veronica, it does. 1246 00:52:58,970 --> 00:53:02,387 Just listen to some of our happy customer's testimonials. 1247 00:53:02,387 --> 00:53:06,387 I used to have hemorrhoids. Now I don't. 1248 00:53:06,387 --> 00:53:08,970 Thanks, Escargold Butt Patches! 1249 00:53:12,761 --> 00:53:15,720 So come see us at the Alibi. 1250 00:53:15,720 --> 00:53:18,304 Your butt will thank you. 1251 00:53:20,304 --> 00:53:21,887 - Okay. 1252 00:53:21,887 --> 00:53:23,678 Posted! 1253 00:53:23,678 --> 00:53:24,970 How long you think before 1254 00:53:24,970 --> 00:53:26,636 people will come through the door? 1255 00:53:26,636 --> 00:53:29,179 Oh, that door is gonna bust open any second now. 1256 00:53:29,179 --> 00:53:32,095 Here we go. 1257 00:53:32,095 --> 00:53:33,720 - Shot? - Sure. 1258 00:53:33,720 --> 00:53:36,053 Any second now. 1259 00:53:41,429 --> 00:53:42,720 I guess not. 1260 00:53:42,720 --> 00:53:44,636 Well, fuck, we tried. 1261 00:53:44,636 --> 00:53:47,553 Ladies and gentlemen, 1262 00:53:47,553 --> 00:53:49,636 today I take a knee 1263 00:53:49,636 --> 00:53:53,429 in support of the following causes-- 1264 00:53:53,429 --> 00:53:55,387 PETA's Lobster Empathy Center, 1265 00:53:55,387 --> 00:53:57,429 The Cigar Rights of America, 1266 00:53:57,429 --> 00:54:00,179 the Asperger Pride Movement, 1267 00:54:00,179 --> 00:54:03,678 Parents Who Are Against Miralax, 1268 00:54:03,678 --> 00:54:06,220 Parents Who Are Against Spelling Bees, 1269 00:54:06,220 --> 00:54:09,887 and Association for Canine Spirituality. 1270 00:54:09,887 --> 00:54:10,761 Thanks. 1271 00:54:16,137 --> 00:54:20,387 Todd! Todd! Todd! Todd! Todd! 1272 00:54:20,387 --> 00:54:23,095 Mickey, come on, hold up. 1273 00:54:23,095 --> 00:54:25,595 Leave me alone, Gallagher. 1274 00:54:25,595 --> 00:54:26,970 It's just that I hadn't really thought 1275 00:54:26,970 --> 00:54:28,803 this marriage shit through. 1276 00:54:28,803 --> 00:54:30,262 I don't know, I didn't think we were gonna be 1277 00:54:30,262 --> 00:54:31,636 having this fucking conversation today. 1278 00:54:31,636 --> 00:54:34,053 Then why the fuck did you bring it up? 1279 00:54:34,053 --> 00:54:35,803 The whole thing was your fucking idea! 1280 00:54:35,803 --> 00:54:37,137 - You talked me into this shit! - I know! 1281 00:54:37,137 --> 00:54:38,678 I know! 1282 00:54:38,678 --> 00:54:40,429 Frank and Monica aren't exactly 1283 00:54:40,429 --> 00:54:42,137 the fucking picture of marital bliss, okay? 1284 00:54:42,137 --> 00:54:43,678 I don't really have a frame of reference 1285 00:54:43,678 --> 00:54:45,053 to connect this shit to. 1286 00:54:45,053 --> 00:54:46,761 - Oh, poor fucking you. - It's not personal. 1287 00:54:46,761 --> 00:54:47,470 - It's fine, it's fine. - It's not personal. 1288 00:54:47,470 --> 00:54:49,636 Mickey, I love you! 1289 00:54:52,387 --> 00:54:55,636 It's--it's marriage that I don't know if I love, you know? 1290 00:54:55,636 --> 00:54:57,678 Maybe, I-I-- I don't know. 1291 00:54:57,678 --> 00:55:00,137 But you're right, it is--it is really fucking important, 1292 00:55:00,137 --> 00:55:03,345 so can we just talk about it for one second, please? 1293 00:55:03,345 --> 00:55:05,179 I-- 1294 00:55:05,179 --> 00:55:07,179 I want to know how you feel, you know? 1295 00:55:34,470 --> 00:55:36,845 Fucking really, Mickey? 1296 00:55:38,304 --> 00:55:40,262 Fuck. 1297 00:55:43,429 --> 00:55:46,678 - Hey. - Hey. 1298 00:55:53,720 --> 00:55:57,053 Okay, so Aunt Oopie... 1299 00:55:57,053 --> 00:55:59,636 she can't be Fred's guardian, Tami. 1300 00:55:59,636 --> 00:56:03,387 No, yeah. I know. 1301 00:56:03,387 --> 00:56:05,887 She's racist as fuck. 1302 00:56:05,887 --> 00:56:09,887 I thought it would get more subtle with age, but... 1303 00:56:09,887 --> 00:56:12,678 What's with the third person? 1304 00:56:12,678 --> 00:56:15,012 "Aunt Oopie's here." 1305 00:56:15,012 --> 00:56:16,220 "Aunt Oopie baked." 1306 00:56:16,220 --> 00:56:19,220 I know. 1307 00:56:19,220 --> 00:56:22,137 She's weird and sad. 1308 00:56:22,137 --> 00:56:25,220 Doesn't mean that Aunt Oopie can't babysit, right? 1309 00:56:27,262 --> 00:56:29,678 It's not like Fred understands what she's saying. 1310 00:56:31,470 --> 00:56:34,304 I don't think his hearing even works yet. 1311 00:56:35,803 --> 00:56:39,012 What if something happens to us? 1312 00:56:39,012 --> 00:56:42,220 We don't have anyone to be Fred's guardian. 1313 00:56:43,761 --> 00:56:46,095 So nothing'll happen to us. 1314 00:56:47,928 --> 00:56:50,095 Make a deal right now... 1315 00:56:50,095 --> 00:56:51,761 neither one of us will die. 1316 00:57:01,304 --> 00:57:03,095 Deal. 1317 00:57:17,262 --> 00:57:19,511 Hey, jaywalking's illegal. 1318 00:57:19,511 --> 00:57:21,387 Buzz off. 1319 00:57:21,387 --> 00:57:24,137 You sure you want to say that to me?